Volunteering at Amaudo Itumbauzo

Friday 23rd May- Weave on/ Mr&Mrs Cabin Biscuite/ a nice surprise

2008-07-10T22:27:00.002+01:00

It was Eunice turn to be fixing weave on. Her own was to be long hair. It reminded me of a conversation I had with Laura Carter where she told me that Beyonce did not have real hair and it was some really good wig. Now I am suspecting it is weave on but neither of us knew what weave on was. I really am learning some interesting things. Whilst this was going on I decided to sit down and draw Mr and Mrs Cabin biscuit. I eat Oxford Cabin Biscuit so much. I only stated buying them because of the packaging, and still feel that it is 80% due to the packaging that I eat them so much. They are Rich Tea and the box is massive.
Eunice, Martha and I had dinner. Eunice went to bed at 9 so Martha and I were just taking tea. Tea of the evening was Milo. This is a Nigerian brand of hot chocolate. I did not like it at first and missed the English brands (like Tesco and Waitrose own.) But what I was doing wrong was not adding enough powder and milk. Milo is actually very nice, chocolate with small malt and it’s slightly nutty. It is better than Hazlenut Options because Options has a fake flavour. Milo is like drinking praline.

There was a big noise at the gate and lots of shouting. It looked like a fight. I got my hopes up that it was my lost items returning but I decided it was a bit unrealistic. Then Ouku called me to tell me that my things had come back. A group of Okada boys were all holding on to an ugly looking youth. He was topless so they were holding on to his jeans and his arms and legs to stop him escaping. Most people from Amaudo heard the noise so came out from their houses to see what the matter was. Finding the items and the identity of the thief was such a relief because firstly everyone was worried it reflected badly on their country for me to be robbed. Secondly the thief did not come from the Amaudo centre neither was he a member of the local community. He was an outsider who had been hanging about doing useless things and had been causing trouble to the people of Okopedi for some time now.
People were shouting PRAIIIISSSEEEEE THE LORD!!! Hey, it was none of us, didn’t I say that all along?! Told you so it was an outsider. It’s none of us people. I knew it wasn’t so and so. Wow, what a happy news. Well done. I wanted to have my items back but they had to keep them as evidence. Kelechis brother was holding the bag.

Bro- Are all three your own?
Me- Three items?
Bro- Yes computer, I pod and this face torch
Me- Oh riiight this useless thing. Yes it is my own. Gosh that boy is a useless criminal everything he gathered was already broken. This thing stopped working almost a month ago.

Success- Carol do you want to know when you were robbed
Me- Yes go find out if it was whilst we were at dining or if I was stupid enough not to notice as soon as we got home.
Success- OK I will go ask him
[Goes to boy]
Success- Carol your not going to like this.
Me- Why?
Success- He said he robbed you by 4pm Saturday
[We both laugh]

I was so embarrassed. I laughed and laughed. It means I am so messy and untidy that it took me more than 30 hours to even notice I had been robbed. I felt well ashamed. It was bad enough that when I showed Cecil the cut in my blind and my room he exclaimed “Gosh, not only did he rob you he also trashed the place!”. And I had to admit that actually the trashing of the room was all my own work. It was worsened slightly because of my stirring up my room to look for the missing items. However everyone that knows me also knows how messy I am and how I like to spread all my mess to any place I can get away with extending it to. I am even getting in trouble by carrying useless things into Welfare Officers house to clutter him up like shoes and scarves and tins of food. I half wanted to phone my granny and tell her because I knew how much she would laugh but I was worried that she would feel angry/disappointed that I have never learned to become tidy yet.

The boy was taken into the office to talk to co-ordinator and Cecil. Welfare Officer is away so Martha and I went back to call him. It was getting late and I concluded that I would hear all the news in the morning until I would be sick to death of hearing so I may as well go back to my hot chocolate and hit the hay. We ended up going to bed at 1 so we were even confused where the time had gone.

Tuesday 22nd May- Retail therepy?!

2008-07-10T22:12:00.001+01:00

We went for email and Benson took me shopping. I did not mean him to take me shopping but I had gone to use his connections with the police to be able to get a report to claim on my travel insurance. He said it would be ok and he bought me sweet corn, eggs and bread. I had to stop him and tell him to leave because the stress given to me from trying to manoeuvre about the market in a car was even greater than on foot. I surprised myself by finding that because the markets use to cause me so much stress. Coming out onto the road where the vehicles and bikes move would cause me to almost hyperventilate. Finding vehicle more stressful really shows how well I have adjusted to the environment.

Wednesday 21st May- Pet Bird

2008-07-10T22:03:00.003+01:00

Eunice and Martha’s favourite doctor was staying this week Dr. Obayi (Oh-bye) He is such a hard working man. He likes to read medical books all through the evening sometimes till 2am. Everyone likes it when he comes to Amaudo because he really enjoys the work and engages with the residents. Ward round was magic. The doctor keenly drove on discussions into detail such fine detail. We explored if the jerky walking which quite a lot of residents have adopted could be a side effect of drugs or if those people have catatonic schizophrenia so it is a mental slight paralysis. This causes some of them to walk like zombies its quite weird sometimes because the drugs make them sleepy and some of them are very slow.

In the afternoon Martha made her hair into weave on. This is where you plat the hair and then sow on strips of hair over the top to create a Caucasian style of hair.

John the cook gave me a gift to cheer me up. He caught one of those small yellow and black birds that nest in the palm trees and kept it in his hands to give to me. When I came back to Eunices house and saw the bird I was so surprised to see it sitting in his hands. He tied a little rope on its leg to make a lead and I had a pet bird for the afternoon.
Some of the children from the village admired my bird and asked me to dash it them. I felt slightly bad that a small child wanted to enjoy the bird and I was just being a big kid. One of the residents came to beg me not to give it them. She said that over here people like to eat the birds so the children would only kill it. Eunice confirmed that the tiny bird makes a tasty snack. I let the bird go free back to his nest to live another day.

Tuesday 20th May- Nonya. yeah right.

2008-07-10T22:00:00.000+01:00

I was up early again. I checked the door half expecting my items to be waiting to me. Everyone is still chatting about the thief but I am getting bored. Ernest called and said him and Nonya were coming soonish. I told them I was out of milk and please if they could help me because you can’t get powdered peak from Amaudo only evaporated milk.

I called up Amaudo UK and they said that I need to get a police report to be able to claim from my insurance. I have been warned against the police because they like money too much. If they come then they will like to do all kinds of funny things to be able to make the maximum amount of money. Catching money is even more important than catching the thief. If they come then they may start arresting innocent people to gather their bail money and will beat the people in prison and cause a lot of bother. From a utilitarian point of view, weighing up pleasure vs pain, it is much better I forget the claim and just buy new ones. I would rather I pay £150 to replace my I pod than risk an innocent village man jail and paying a bail of 3,000N. The lap top is an EEPC, a new small computer made for children that is only £200 to buy with all of the software already on it. My only regret is that the person will not be able to have any gain from the useless items and will not even be able to sell them. They are probably lying in the bush somewhere getting soaked in rain.

Kate UK told me that Nonya is away in South Africa staying in Cape Town. Nonya called me saying he was in Ummiah and could not come because he had spent the morning with a friend who had just come back from Lagos and now it was too late to think about coming to and from Amaudo with these bad roads. 30 minuets later that Ernest turned up. He said he did not want to disappoint me and that I needed milk. Nonya is sick in bed with malaria. I said is he not in Cape Town. He said Nonya is too sick to go to Cape Town so he missed his flight. I said how can that be if he phoned me asking to come yesterday and phoned me 30 minuets ago to tell me he was seeing a friend and would not be able to make it any more. Ernest spoke a lot of funny things. He emptied lots of photos of English people from his wallet and said how they were related to him. I was not really bothered as I have met plenty of whites from England so I don’t see them as anything amazing. He kept asking what to buy me as a gift as if I have no money of my own. What’s your shoe size? Do you like wrapper? Do you like Jeans trouser? What about cover shoe or do you only like sandal? What is the thing that would make you most happy? I looked at him long and hard. I said I know what you can buy me that would make me the most happy. A cold glass of semi-skimmed cow’s milk with a side plate of chocolate digestives and chocolate covered malted cow biscuits. He was stumped because fresh milk is not here and nor is there fridge freezers.

Monday 19th May- BLOOD OF JESUS/ HOLY GHOST-FIRE/ MAY GOD REVIEL THE SECRET

2008-07-10T21:54:00.001+01:00

I did not sleep so well last night. I was awake at half 5. My house was very dark after Kelechi bolting all of the shutters locked so no light would enter (or any other thing for that matter). In chapel they annonced what had happened and said they were going to have an investigation all day starting from with in Amaudo and then spreading out. All of the residents houses were searched and all of the staff questioned, not because they were suspecting anyone but because every investigation needs to start from the middle and move outwards. From the centre Rev Kenneth went to the Mbukwa village and asked the youth leader to alert everyone that some items were stolen and everyone should keep their eyes open for when the thief dumps them or tries to sell them.

Residents do not steal electrical items. If a resident steals then they go for food items or clothing or money. There aren’t any residents that steal in Amaudo at the moment, it is usually when they are fresh from the street and if you are mindful of bringing your washing in as soon as it dries and don’t keep your food visible then it is easily avoidable. I have made friends with all of the workers on one level or another so in my mind I have already ruled out all of them. Cecil is in charge of sponsorship of children born to residents and some children from the village so knows the boys very well and likes them so much. The village people enjoy Amaudo, they are an extension of our community. They are free to come in jest with the staff and residents, lick mango, buy recharge card for topping up their phones from Martha and come and buy provisions in our shop. Every time I see anyone they are friendly and greet me so it also would be very hard to believe that someone from the close community could come and steel from Amaudo.

All I can know from the evidence at hand was that the thief was young and did not know the value or purpose of the items they stole. They did not see the need for the charger for the lap top or for the packaging which was easily locatable in my room. Chances are they will not know what an I pod is because I have only seen one boy using I tunes in he internet café in 2 months. The computer had some trouble over here and I need to get a new charger before it can work again and the I pod lost all of its music so both items are completely useless to everybody apart from me. I am partly responsible for the crime as I had been leaving one of my bed room shutters open at the back for light to get me up in the morning. I don’t like having them open at the front of the house for if anyone sees me sleeping in late or dressing. What I think happened is that the thief was licking mango and saw my shutter open and decided to have a look. Saw a lap top at the end of my bed and was tempted so tore the blind. Inside my room they thought if I steel this I may as well have a look about so then took the I pod. I can’t imagine they planned it because they should have had the sense to look for the chargers and other bits to go with the things.

Nonya called and asked if he could come see me in Amaudo. He is the adopted son of Ross Cowell so I am curious to meet him. He and his friend have been calling me quite a lot asking to take me round town and have now given up on me coming to them so said they would come to me. I said what had happened and they said they would come the next day.

Martha came back today from helping V/Rev Timothy. She was sorry for what happened and we ate food with Eunice.

Church was for me tonight. The sermon was on why it is wrong to steel and how it is a sin. Chapel usually ends at half 8 but we stayed on almost till 9 having an extra big prayer session lead by Rev Kenneth. He was pointing his hands and flailing his arms like a front crawl swimmer in a thunderstorm. BLOOD OF JESUS COVER THIS PLACE
HOLY SPIRIT
FIRE
MAY THE THEIF NEVER REST (AMEN)
GOD REVEIL THE THEIF (AMEN)
BLOOD OF JESUS
BRING OUT THE THEIF (AAAAMMMMEEENN)
GOD IN HEVEN YOU KNOW EVERYTHING REVIEL THE SECRET
REVIEL THE SECRET
HOLY SPIRIT
FIRE
STIKE DOWN THE CRIMINAL
CAST OUT EVEIL FROM OUR COMMUNITY AND VILLAGE
BLOOD OF JESUS PROTECT AMAUDO (AMEN)

Other things were said but I can’t really remember now. I have never had a prayer like that before. It shows that everyone really cares and is seriously angry about the crime. After such a lot of shouting and praying and screaming of Amen till peoples voices went horse it will be pretty bad if the items do not turn up.

Sunday 18th May- Induction of Very Rev Timothy and a nasty surprise for laters

2008-07-10T21:49:00.001+01:00

Time for the long awaited service for the induction of Very Reverend Timothy. Amaudo took a vehicle and the Helping Hands bus to show our best support.

The service was good, we were in a cathedral and it was completely filled up with friends and well wishers. It was a normal service with a section for the induction, presentation of new cloth for him and blessings. Then he and his wife sat at the front and people came up and gave him gifts of money and pledges of money to congratulate him. When a person goes to the offering bole then they are given a calendar to keep in their house and remember the day. I know that my parents sent our gift through a bank transfer so did not feel the need to go and announce it because he knew and I knew so weather people know or not then it doesn’t matter. I sat and let everyone else fight for calendars. I was sitting next to Benson. He asked me if I would like to follow him to Abuja for a few days on business. I was not really sure what I will do there but I suppose it could be interesting.

My friend Rev Peter was doing the MC-ing for the event. He is a very funny reverend and I like him a lot. He asked why I did not announce my gift and if I meant I was a nun. I have been asked if I am a nun a couple of times. I guess nuns must be common over here. Being a white in traditional dress got a lot of attention, people where really pleased that I was ‘trying’ (at being a Nigerian I suppose). A lot of people noticed my chief beads and said oh baby are you a chief? And I would say yes. I was made chief on the 11th of May in Igbrerre last week as a matter of fact.

We came back in the afternoon and I decided to loose my attachments. It was big work and my hair underneath was spoilt and awful looking. I showered then sat with Eunice chatting until we went to dining. I am getting bored of rice with stew so we came back pretty quick. After Eunice went to give drugs Ansylem came to chat to me. He is an ex resident and fully stable. He has been to university to study accountancy so is intelligent and witty. We lay on our backs enjoying the concrete bench with our heads together sometimes lying on our fronts like we were having a girly sleep over. He was discharged from Amaudo in 2004, his twin brother came to the ceremony and gave Amaudo 22,000N and goat to eat. He is a big man and lives in Lagos and Port Harcourt. His mother is late but his father is still alive. He married a second wife who has born one child who Anasylem and his brother sponsor. The wife is not very nice to the children of the first wife. We chatted until the rain desturbed us and he left me to go to bed. I then called my home and spoke to each family member one by one.

Coming into my room I noticed the blind was open and torn. I did not have any light in my room because there was no fuel for the generator and I still don’t know how to on lantern. I ran to security and met Kelechi on the way. I showed him where my house had been entered and he helped my search if anyone was hiding. I then got security so I could have more light and went to wake up Eunice to find out where that ex resident was who had been hanging about all day. She had been sitting outside helping me loose my hair and then did her own so I hoped she would have noticed if someone had come whilst we were at dining. I didn’t notice anything funny before dining and I spent sometime wondering about my room getting changed so I was pretty sure that the burgerler came whilst I was at dining. They stole my lap top but left the charger behind even though it had been sitting on top of it. Then they stole my brand new I Pod classic (80 gig) but left all of the wires, head phones and speakers behind. We reported to co-ordinator and he came to see. Then Eunice made me a cup of tea and I sat with her and Kelechi. House Parents have to get up at 5 to take their baths and get up so that they can get their residents up and bathed at 6 and give them their drugs. I felt bad keeping them up, so after taking tea I was happy and told them to go and sleep. Eunice went but Kelechi stayed worrying about me. I said I was fine but he kept worrying if I would be scared and how someone could do this to me and why did it happen? He prayed and prayed and pleaded to God for the thief to be found. I told him to calm down and that I was already settled and quite ready to go to bed so he shouldn’t keep me up.

Saturday 17th May- Story time wiht Eunice

2008-07-10T21:46:00.000+01:00

I should be setting foot in my house again today and unpacking my suite cases but instead I am playing in my goat farm with Kelechi. When he first saw the goats he just wanted to eat them, and they would run away from him. Today he has baby eating from his hand, I told him he has become too soft now so he will have trouble to kill them.
I have been enjoying relaxing in the sun with Sister Eunice licking mangos. Considering the cost of mango back home it feel pretty luxurious to be able to eat mango after mango, if you come to a bruise or a bad spot you can just chuck it into the bush an open another one. She told me any interesting things. Many people have come to me showing off that their relations own the land that Amaudo is built on. (This includes the Chaplin Rev Peter from Amaudo.) Eunice told me that before Ross came the land was Evil forest and nobody dared enter the bush to use it for building houses or making farm land. When Ross came and asked for the land they did not really mind because they thought it was cursed and useless so they all agreed she was welcome to it. When the work men came and cleared the bush and started making the compound beautiful, planting trees, making a farm and building houses suddenly the land became attractive again and people started digging up documents to work out who really had owned it. Then the people who claimed previous ownership felt they had rights to benefit from this new development. When the bell went for dining village people would come to eat. When new clothing came in for residents then the villagers would want to be given their own. Amaudo is helping the community around them and promised to help all of the landowners children go through their education as a way of thanking them. Amaudo have got electrics stepped down which they will benefit from when it gets fixed up properly. Some children from the village are under Amaudo sponsorship. Most of the staff come from close by. When Ross built the compound she said there was to be no fence or restriction of movement so that nobody is kept out and nobody is kept in Amaudo that wishes to leave.

Eunice told me about her praying at 2am because that the time when evil happens and the trouble she gets from the evil noises from the bush. The Owls cause her a lot of trouble, when they like to hoot in front of her house they go ‘woooo’ ‘ooooo’ and she has to get up to sing songs of praise to drive them away. She reads them Bible and prays till they go. Sometimes she can pray and sing from 12 till 3 am. She said that Rev Kenneth also joins in when he gets disturbed from the owls. Martha use to join in at first but began to feel it unproductive because she needs to learn to ignore them and not to let them disturb her sleep. She did however agree that evil spirits can enter animals such as owls and foxes.

Eunice took me to Ndewo market and to say hello again to her family. In the market I bought a new wrapper to keep unsown so I can tie wrapper like a skirt and be free. The wrapper goes down to my toes to protect me from insects that want to bite me and drink my blood. Martha went away today to go help V/Rev prepare for his induction. She works too hard, whilst he is away we will have to relax and make sure we are eating fine. I have managed my money very well. I budgeted to stay for 2 months and I still have £100 left. I will have to get some money sent out to help me with this month so let us enjoy the money.

Friday 16th May- Pat goes back to England alone....whilst i relax in the sun licking mango after mango

2008-07-10T21:43:00.002+01:00

This is the day I should be travelling to Lagos and from Lagos to London to meet my family at the airport and drive back to Bristol. I was thinking what it must be like back home whilst licking mangos with Eunice and Rose. My friend Laura Carter who was traveling said when she came home England was cold, rainy and crap. I feel pretty lucky to be here still. Very Revered Timothy’s induction will be on Sunday so I was able to follow a vehicle out to town, buy lots of food and get another vehicle home. I bought a large round house loaf wider than my hips and as heavy as 4 ordinary loaves for 250N (just over £1). Apples are sold in Nigeria but are imported from South Africa so are small and expensive. I really miss apples.

Thursday 15th May- NEWSFLASH:Comfort washes cloth

2008-07-10T21:41:00.001+01:00

Comfort is a stubborn washer. She is stubborn about bathing and refuses to keep her cloth. Dirty clothing just heaps up in a big pile and she will try to wear it over and over. She gives Eunice big work making her change it and burn the ones that smell bad. Seeing as I was having a laundry day I invited Comfort to come wash with me. We carried our cloth in buckets down to the pump and pumped and washed together. She did very well and I think she enjoyed the company. Eunice her house parent is on leave but I wish I could have shown her how well she did!

I decided to wear my george wrapper to church with a jumper because its comfortable and hides my legs from mosquitoes. I enjoy the way it looks. I think I will keep wearing it in England. When I came back from Chapel V/Rev said that I was not supposed to treat my cloth like that and it is too special for everyday usage. If I wear it in that manner I will offend the cloth and women will feel cross for me doing it like that. He said I should wear it with a lace blouse and keep it for a special occasion like his induction.

Wednesday 14th May- Pat & Television

2008-07-10T21:40:00.000+01:00

We had two special visitors today. The first was a television crew to make a programme on Amaudo. The second was Pat the nurse from Wales who I had arranged to travel back with for company in Lagos.

The television crew were making a programme to raise awareness about Amaudo and show the people the problems that Amaudo are facing like the bad road. The presenter interviewed me and liked me so much she invited me to come for my own television interview and to stay at her house.
Kelechi went to Bende to get things for making a nice lunch for Pat when she came so that we could return her hospitable welcome. They were running late so I went to ward round.
When Pat came we took her on a tour of Amaudo to show her residents, the workshop which was holding the Adult Education Class at that time, dining, kitchen, goats the Chapel of Peace and everything. Martha plugged her some of our mango and she had to get going because of the bad roads to they would get back before dark. It felt funny saying goodbye to Pat knowing I was suppose to go with her. She said she had mixed feelings about going back. Nigeria is a very welcoming place and her training has been so much needed. Then again she has a husband and children and a job waiting for her back at home. Rolling hills and forests full of bluebells and fresh milk to drink. She has been married for 20 something years and never spent any time away from her husband. She said that after coming to Nigeria by herself for 2 months she will never be scared of living alone again. I thought that was a lovely thing to get from her trip.

Tuesday 13th May- Changed my visa and plane tickets

2008-07-10T21:39:00.000+01:00

I got my visa extended for June and changed my flight tickets. It is now fixed that I will enjoy another month in Amaudo. I am wondering if I will even feel ready to go when the 21st of June comes. The things I miss about England are
1) Soft meat (chicken) (burgers) (lamb)
2) My bank account. I enjoy paying with plastic. Carrying money is a pain, its soft and torn and dirty and you have to carry everything you wish to spend.
3) Going to the pub

Coming back the rain was awful. I was scared, not for my life, but it was the kind of night where you could imagine having to get something amputated. The by the time we got to Bende road there was next to zero visibility and I asked V/Rev if we could pull over and sleep the night in the car. He said no and drove on puddles parting so high it was like Moses parting the Red Sea. I really feared the other motorists (if there were any) because we wouldn’t have been able to spot them and people drive crazy enough in fine weather conditions.

Monday 12th May- Cheif Caroline welcome home in Amaudo

2008-07-10T21:34:00.002+01:00

Everyone was calling me Chief this morning. I felt glad that everyone had forgotten about the lateness issue and the no food issue and the scattering of the day and were giving me congratulations. I helped my new goat settle in that Benson gave me to replace the male that died on Thursday. He is a fine male with soft glossy fur my only problem is that he does not like to eat the biscuits I am using to tame them. Its kind of sad that the cheiftancy is over now. I had looked forward to it so much and i really badly wanted a crown. Apparently the man giving my speech again in Igbo completely messed it up and said I had lived in Nigeria since 1989 and had set up Amaudo and was now coming to Ibgeree to set up a new Amaudo. So everyone clapped. I did some much needed house work. My unwelcome guests, the lizard family, have been leaving little gifts behind for me and I am fed up of the ants helping me with my washing up.

Sunday 11th May- at last my CHEIFTANCY day!

2008-07-10T21:14:00.005+01:00

Martha, Eunice and I left at 8 to be with Benson for 9 to be able to go to the service he has each Sunday with the poor from his village. We came in when he was going out and ended up sitting in his house watching movies till almost 11 before hearing anything. I was feeling slightly annoyed because I knew he had invited people for 11 on the card. The destitute were off hiding somewhere and no one could locate their service. And my clothing to wear to their service looked so beautiful and it was getting wasted inside the house.

Amaudo came but we waited for hours for King Joseph to turn up. The network services were all down so phone calls were pretty impossible. I changed into my george wrapper and white blouse for the ceremony. I felt so grown up stepping out in such fine clothing. The white lace shirt resembled the top of a wedding gown, the make up painted my face fine enough for television, the shoes made me stand better and more feminine and the canopy added two or three feet to my height. Because of the time delay they decided to make the service as short as possible.

I was presented a certificate and given the title ADA DI NA MBA I then presented a short speech to say thank you and to outline what I had done in Amaudo to explain why I had been made a chief. Then an interpretator gave my speech again in Igbo and I went outside to dance. I was slightly wondering what had happened to my horse tail, fan and crown I had been promised but I decided it was a gift so whatever happens I will be grateful for.

After the ceremony we danced back to the house. Amaudo left to race it back in time for dining because there was no food provided. I thought it was a bit odd because Benson had said invite loads of people because there will be plenty to eat. I then found out it was traditional for me to bring the food so that was a bit frustrating because I could easily have done that if I knew I was suppose to do that.

Then we met up with the destitute. It was pretty nice everyone was singing and dancing for me. Most of them were pretty poor, there were blind, and people with physical disabilities but they all had each other and their families around them and belonged to the community so where not destitute. It made me wonder if Benson had really spent enough time at Amaudo talking to the residents and staff to fully understand who we care for and their position before we trace their homes, medicate them and modify their behaviour to the point they can be rehabilitated home and can learn a trade to support themselves. Anyway he tries a lot for Amaudo and respects the work. These Igberee people are his own people and it is good that he is doing all these things for him because so many people get money and forget their roots and their people. As their new chief I gave them some money for feeding so they were happy.

Oh i almost forgot to mention that Benson's gift to me was to replace my male goat that died wiht one of his. This new male is black, looks pretty strong and is a year or so older so i feel pretty lucky!!!!

Saturday 10th May- 1 more day to go till i become a cheif

2008-07-10T20:59:00.001+01:00

I was tempted to go to town to choose my shoes and head tie since Bensons girls had decided to change them from red to gold but I was feeling too tired. Instead I went with Kelechi and Ansylem to go tend for my goats. Seeing as baby is still a bit sick I decided to clear their pen fully and clean it up very fine to prevent disease. We cleared the big pile of sticks and rubbish out from by the door and used big knives to chop away all of the stupid little plants that were growing wild and messy. I asked Kelechi to get rid of the funny lumpy grown on the floor, Ansylem said that ants lived in it but I thought he was joking so I ordered it to be removed. A few minuets later I was walking over the area and found big ants on my feet biting me. It hurt so much I jumped onto the wall to escape and nurse my foot and refused to come down to all the work was finished. It took all morning and was hard work but we did a good job so I was pleased. I bought biscuits and juice to celebrate the big work with my boys and then enjoyed a short sleep before sitting down to plan my speech.

I showed Eunice my cloth and dressed up in it, did my make-up and practised dancing about my house. Cecil had been in England for three weeks so my mother was able to send me my make-up kit for tomorrow, some instant coffee, a couple of jigsaws for Wonderful School and some more malaria pills for extending my stay. I was excited about tomorrow and wanted V/Rev to come back to plan vehicle movement.

For dinner V/Rev, Martha and I ate Irish potato chips and I chatted away about tomorrow like a small child waiting for Christmas. I was actually more excited than I have been about Christmas for the past 12 or something years. V/Rev made me a hot chocolate and put me to bed early. It has become a habit that after sharing food, drink and company with Martha and himself he will always help carry my things back to my house and check for visitors. At first it was ants that would always be in my house getting at my food and he would come and stamp on them for me. There has been giant millipedes, praying mantis, grasshoppers and crickets. My most recent trouble has been snake-lizard. One of them has decided to make its home in my scarf and keeps leaving droppings on my bookcase. One morning I was trying to tie the scarf for church and it hung on so I was wearing it like a broach till I noticed and threw it screaming across the room.

Friday 9th May- Going into town on my own to collect my cheiftancy cloth!

2008-07-10T20:57:00.002+01:00

The mechanic was moving out to town at 10 so I was argued into entering the vehicle 2 or 3 hours before I intended to leave. I was in town by half 11 so decided to have a wander around the market and enjoy being free to stop and look at anything that caught my eye with out worrying where Martha was walking. Shopping free from time constraints was another luxury. I wanted to get some make up and beads for my chieftaincy ceremony and then see what else looked good.

I went to the part where the Alsa people come to sell. I asked the advice of a girl on what beads I needed to get and she was kind enough to take me away from the stall and lead my through the market to the correct shop. The asking price was 800N for necklace, earrings and bracelet. We reduced it to 250N although I am not sure what happened to my bracelet. As soon as she left my side I stood out like a beautiful zebra that had run loose in the market. Everyone was shouting at me and wanting to catch me and got overly excited when I trotted past. What will you buy Mrs White? What do you need?….NOTHING!! I do not need to buy anything!!! And they would laugh and leave me. I had fun exploring and teasing the market people by running back and forth past their shop it was a good learning experience to practising pricing. I got things cheaper than even Eunice and Martha can get them but as I did not know the value of the items I did not realise what was happening so I just laughed and ran away whenever anyone thought they had a sale. I ventured into the market so deep I found the farm section where they sell chickens. A big turkey escaped from his cage and came to frighten me. I did not like that ugly bird one bit. I saw a funny looking bird lying on the floor. He was squawking and blinking at me. It took me some seconds to realise that it was a chicken that had had his feathers and head skinned off and that, that was what I was looking at. It was strange seeing a living head. I wonder what his body was up to if it was running about also or if they had it tied up with rope?

I went back to the Alsa people to buy eye liner. One man told me it was 40N but I did not like his colours. I found one I wanted and suddenly the price was 100N. I told the boy he was being cheeky and I would never talk to him again. He was then begging me to have it for 50N. I said it was too late and I skipped off. I got a green one and a double colour black/white one both for 40N. I met a friendly fat man who I wanted to buy a horse pendent from. His sister said 600N but we played and joked for almost 20 minuets because I had nothing better to do. In the end I told him that it was tacky and going to spoil too fast and probably turn my skin green so it would be 200N and put the money down and took the horse and ran away. I came back again and he tired to sell me necklaces with baby scorpions in that glowed in the dark. He sells with his sister and they kept my company till I decided it was close enough to 3 for me to go to Benson early.

Bensons securities love me too much. Benson was held in a meeting till after 4 so we had plenty of time to joking and story telling. They had their lunch brake whilst I was there and shared to me. We ate roasted yam with some green vegetable sauce. It was actually surprisingly good. If I see it being sold again I will defiantly buy some. At 4 Benson came out and gave me Innocent to drive us to my tailor. The tailor was a horrible woman. She had sown my cloth too small so I could not even get the shirt on. The lace skirt was skin tight. I joked that I had fatted from eating too much garri. The joke wore thin by the time I got to my white lace shirt where she had to adjust it three times before I could get it on. I abused her and abused her how dare she make a cloth I can not enter. She took my measurements and if she wants to ignore them and do it wrong she should at least make it too big and then reduce it so I would feel complemented not insulted. We all laughed. Its quite fun being able Welfare officer called to say him and Martha would not be coming home that night and would not be coming to collect me. I was annoyed because it was half 5 and I was still in the tailor. When we got back I told Benson I was not getting my lift so he helped me to Bende and gave me a bike home. I was back in Amaudo just seconds before the heavens broke and the rain fell. It truly is rainy season now.

Thursday 8th May- Repatriation & Making hair

2008-07-10T20:37:00.005+01:00

Eunice as the Amaudo nurse was doing repatriation and asked me to come along and see. She phoned her favourite bike driver Kwufire (coo-free). The road was horrid but he drove well. When we got to the bad place we saw a bike carrying a boy and a fat woman carrying a bag of garry. When they tired to pass on the road infront of us the weight was too much for the bike so it escaped out from underneath them throwing them into the mud. All of our residents were able to receive their monthly modicate. The only report is that now one of the patients changed to go to town to receive drugs, this sounded funny because the ones he receives from Amaudo are free. Eunice said she would try and check up on them soon.

We got to Eunice took me to her village in Ndiwo to get my hair platted for my chieftaincy so I will look like a proper Nigerian Chief. I had grown to enjoy the Ghana weaving that Martha had done so was apprehensive of getting a new style. We settled on Bob Marley and got to work at around 4pm. It was a slow and painful process for everyone involved. I would say especially me because of the small small hairs they were pulling and binding but everyone was getting hungry and working against the clock because it starts getting dark at 6. At one point I had 3 different people working on my hair!
Whilst we were platting a group of women came along dancing and singing. They were coming to celebrate the birth of a new child so were very happy praising God and sharing powder (talc) with everyone to rub on their necks and faces to share the good news. (That’s why the small child in the photo has a white face!) When we had finally finished they dipped the hair in boiling water to make the ends go curly and stop them unraveling and packed it into a tight bun so it would dry pretty.

We got home at half past 8. It was a long day but the hair was very beutiful. The woman after 3 and a half-hours platting only asked for 550N. 250N was for getting another packet of attachments and that left 300N for the labour. It means they were working for about 35pence an hour. I feel slightly bad, even though they were more than happy to do it, maybe when I make my hair before I go back to England I will tip her but I did not have much cash.

THE END RESULTS........

Wednesday 7th May- No place like home!

2008-07-10T20:24:00.001+01:00

I caught my goat myself this morning! I think they are getting use to me now. The baby girl was looking a bit sick so we took her out to graze. We put fire so she would not feel the cold when she needed to go back home.

I did some typing for V/Rev and then some more from Rev David for Project Comfort. I relaxed and spent time wandering about the compound chatting to staff and residents. I am really at home here.

Tuesday 6th May- I really want to stay in Amaudo longer

2008-07-10T20:22:00.001+01:00

Tried to change my visor so I could exchange my flight tickets and extend my stay. I am too at home in Amaudo and after being sick for the past while I have not finished my work. It feels funny to think I should be back in England in the next 10 days. Thinking about it there is not really that much to go back for compared to what I have here. I feel that living in Amaudo alongside the destitue that we pick and trying to help them is far more important work than struggling to restore my bank balance to its post Nigeria glory.

After being sick a sharp pain has remained in my chest when I swallow food so I was still a bit weak. The visor men were messing about so we left to collect my card and visit Benson. We chased some donations and followed up money. V/Rev is working very hard to make sure Amaudo does not suffer in this financial crisis. Rather to carry her from strength to strength; as a service to the community, Abia State, and a means of serving the Lord.

Monday 5th May- Sorting staff files

2008-07-10T20:20:00.001+01:00

Martha and I went out to Project Comfort and Amaudo 2 to check over staff files and make sure that all the necessary documents are all present and signed.

It was nice to see the Project Comfort staff again. They were full of jokes and jest. I never imagined that a personal details form could cause so much head ache

Who is my next of kin?
=>Your mother or your farther
But my mummy is old.
=>What does that matter? She is still your next of kin. If you were hurt would you not want her to be the first to know?
Errrmmmmmmmmmmmm……
=>Ok, put your brother/ sister. But see there is another space for calling another person

Other person to contact…..can that be my girlfriend?
=Sure, why not?
Ok then, write your number here
=> (laughs) no.
Why?
=> Because I am not your girlfriend and if they call me in England then there is nothing I can do for you?

In Amaudo 2 Rev David was paying his PC boys to clear trees from the edge of the farm land because of a government promise to build a school in Ntkalako for physically and mentally disabled children. The road down to Amaudo 2 is pretty horrific at the moment and it’s a pretty remote place so it will be a residential school. Boarding school is pretty common over here. Having the school there will be good because they will have a playground and lots more friends for the residents and the people attending Wonderful School. It was a hot day so we dropped past Andrews’s house and collected some palm wine. Andrew is a taper and always loves to welcome visitors to his home and cares very fine. He is a good host and I felt bad for not going to see him again after the first visit.

Sunday 4th May- Joint Amaudo 1&2 sercive

2008-07-10T20:10:00.003+01:00

I took it easy. There was a joint Amaudo 1 and Amaudo 2 service so I made sure I came to church even though I was 40 minuets late in what can be a 3 hour service it is excusable. All of the children of Wonderful School gave me warm greetings and asked me to come back soon. Happiness also came to ask me to come back. I really should go back sometime soon.

Saturday May 3rd- SICKEST I HAVE BEEN IN MY LIFE LIKE EVER!

2008-07-10T20:06:00.002+01:00

This morning I could not get out of bed. It took me till 9 before I shifted from sweating in bed to pressing my body against the cold concrete floor. My body was so void of strength my plan was just to lie where someone can see me when they realise I am missing and come to rescue me. I was hoping Kelechi would still come check me, the resident he usually uses to report back on me came to the window and asked me what I was up to. I hoped he would tell Kelechi and he would come save me but the two did not meet for the rest of the day.

Martha found me. She said she had been in the office and had not wanted to disturb me before 12 incase I was enjoying sleep. She gathered me into Welfare Officers house and I lay on his bed drifting in and out of light sleep. Martha cooked a special pasta meal to tempt me to eat but the spice made me vomit. I was hot and cold and feeling scared that I had not been taking my Malarone malaria prevention tablets exactly at 9 on the dot each night. Rather waiting for food for 20/30 mins for forgetting till 10. When I tired to go to my room I was trying to do the lock when I blacked out and fell shaking on the floor. Martha saw and ran to carry me back to bed. It was a very scary feeling.

I tried had this evening to take some food. I settled for English Breakfast Tea with Cabin biscuit and bread to dunk in. Really worn out. Oh and the doctor that was suppose to come this week decided not to bother.

Friday 2nd May- getting invertation cards printed

2008-07-10T20:04:00.001+01:00

Eunice dressed me up in a canopy and jewellery to take the photograph for my chieftaincy invitation card. I am getting pretty excited now, he is making hunderds of invites so should be a big day!

We went to town and did email and went to the printer. It rained horridly so was scary going about on bike, but we were able to get everything done and did our food shopping. Welfare Officer is still away but he had left Martha the key to his house because he has two stoves so its better to cook in. In the evening we ate yam chips with egg and Eunice, Martha and I watched a movie about a bank robbery.

Sunday 4th May- Amaudo 1&2 joint service

2008-07-10T20:02:00.000+01:00

I took it easy and slept a lot. There was a joint Amaudo 1 and Amaudo 2 service so I made sure I came to church even though I was 40 minuets late in what can be a 3 hour service it is excusable. All of the children of Wonderful School gave me warm greetings and asked me to come back soon. Happiness also came to ask me to come back. I really should go back sometime soon.

Thursday 1st May- Visit to Igberre

2008-07-10T16:06:00.006+01:00

Nigerian public holiday. I had not seen my goats for a day or two now so went to say good morning. The male was lying down with diarrhoea (or podgeing and they call it), runny nose and his body was so cold to touch. I called some residents to put fire and I stroked him to warm his body and scratched his beard and his ears to try and make him feel comforted. It pained me to see he had fallen sick when I had only bought him 11 days ago. Co-ordinator told me the baby boy was sick yesterday but he did not want to worry me. I was pissed off because I felt seeing as I am the owner of the goats I should have a right to know what is happening. Technically I purchased one goat from the fundraising money that Westbury Park Community have worked so committed to give and the other is from my pocket but I picked them both, love them both, and have put in a lot of effort to check them and make them settle in.

Martha and I went to Benson to talk about my invitation cards. I was stronger today and always enjoy the breeze you get from travelling on bike. The sun was warm but manageable. We had a nice bike boy who carried the both of us for 500N and we all jested together.

Benson was surprised that I had come on bike and was not happy. He said it was not a good method of travel for me and would have rather I phoned him from Bende where I left the Amaudo vehicle and he would have driven himself to pick us up. I laughed at him and said if its good enough for Martha then it is good enough for me and although I was scared at first I have long since learned to enjoy bikes.

Bensons daughter was off school from Lagos so her and her cousin came out with us for an outing.We met Bensons mother in the adjacent compound and then went to see his village and all the children and destitute he cares for. Walking through the windy narrow walk ways reminded me of the old towns I had visited in Italy. Benson apologised for if I was to become sad at being exposed to the poverty these people are living in. Collecting and drinking rain water, not clothing fine, having mud houses and no electricity I could not reply because I was afraid he would think I was selfish if I told him I felt too lucky to be walking about a remote village…how many English even come to Nigeria? And then how many to Abia State? It narrows down so small that I stand a good chance of being the first white the children have seen. (There had been a white man a while ago so some older women were asking if I was that mans daughter) The children skipped after me as if I was the pied piper, they came out from almost every house I past to see the white woman, They wanted to touch my skin and enjoyed being photographed.

On the way to the second village we saw 3 vulchers. They reminded me of my sister Joanna and watching Jungle Book so I snapped them for her.

Coincidentally where we stopped the car there was a pathway leading into the bush. The path was good so I was able to see the soldier ants. The air was humid enough for me to believe I was actually entering rain forest. I keep seeing bush and it never looks as exciting as they make it on wildlife programmes or in movies. We walked until we found a clearing where they tap palm wine. There was a man just finishing work so we were able to buy it as fresh as can be. This time when I took palm wine I enjoyed it so much because it feels refreshing and cooling. If I could choose mineral (coke/ fanta), cold water or palm wine I would pick palm wine. When it is fresh the alcohol content is very low and the longer you keep it the more it ferments.
Bensons daughter wanted to take me to the river to paddle. The sun was hot so we picked big umbrella leaves to give us shade.
Coming to the second village I saw Evil Forest which is where the villagers (traditionally/but maybe now) throw evil things. So all of the bodies of those who have died in funny/abnormal ways that caused fear so any disease that was not understood and looked as though it was the work of witches e.g. TB and people that died of strange swellings. They would also throw twins into the forest sometimes with the mother because they felt it unnatural. We visited a compound that only housed old women. All these women had once been married to one man and he kept them all in separate mini houses. There were 30 or more than houses! All of the women would go to work on his farm for free and had born children to help out on the farm and to look after the man in his old age. Now that the man has died the women are left with nothing and are all too old to marry again so it is unimaginably tough.

When we got home Benson gave me 3 bottles of wine as a gift. This is because I had told him I was offended when the waitress at Former Governors house asked me what I would drink and I told her a glass of red or white and she brought me a whole tray of soft drinks, non alcoholic beer and water. He drove us to Bende but was forced to stop because Bende road is so notoriously bad we all knew that his car would not make it. You need to have a Jeep, and event those get scattered far sooner than their life expectancy. I was feeling content and wanted to take Martha to lunch. We went to a little make shift café and I took 100N rice and stew. Martha took garri and agusi soup with added bush meat. She drank 7up and I ordered beer and got a 66cl bottle for 150N (70p). By the end of the meal I still had change from a fiver. It is a bit of a joke because where I work you can’t even buy a 66cl bottle of beer with a fiver!

When I got back Success told me that my goat had been killed. I was pretty sad and even shed a little tear. Everyone else was happy because there was meat in the stew that night. They promised it was not my goat but I said I was not that gullible and would not take dinner. I don’t even enjoy meat over here because they cook it so tough it becomes an effort to chew so I dash it out. Poor little boy only lasted 11 days.

Wednesday 30th April- grumpy doctor sucks the fun from Ward Round

2008-07-10T16:03:00.002+01:00

Wednesdays are ward round, which is always interesting to attend if you have the chance. First is the problem card from House Parent Favour. Then nurse Eunice and the doctor for the week reads the medical report. Workshop gives a progress report and Rev Peter gives his chaplains report. We all have a get togeather and have long descussions about the residents and what can be done to help them get better as quick as possiable and descuss what is holding them back. This week’s doctor was inhumanly grumpy to the point I pray he will reconsider his career choice and work with machines instead. It was such a constant to the last weeks who was so full of laughter and good will. He had got sick one night and I gave him some of my English drugs to make him better and ensure we would not have to loose him before wardround. The next day he was praising the lord and testifying that he has been cured. He enjoyed my dehydration salts to much he admitted to taking an extra unnecessary one in the morning just so he could enjoy the blackcurrant flavour.

Tuesday 19th April- Still sick

2008-07-10T16:02:00.000+01:00

Still feeling pretty ill. I had been up since 4am vomiting all over my porch and cactus. Missed church. Eunice the nurse came to see me (casually) and said there was an all staff meeting at 9 so I got myself fed and took my bath so I could go. News was grim about finances, it was all things I had heard about from the financial crisis meeting so I was not surprised. I can’t really remember the meeting to tell the truth just that it had a mellow to bleak atmosphere and jokes where scarce. Afterwards Success came to keep me company. I did some art and slept off.

Monday 28th April- Not feeling fine.

2008-07-10T16:00:00.001+01:00

I did not sleep fine last night. I was hot and cold and awake a lot in the night. I was weak and Kelechi came to check me and bring my breakfast from dinning for me. He kept begging me to get out of bed and to eat. I ate and vomited it all up again. I told him I knew that i did not wish to take rice and stew. He was very nice to me and poured water on my head and washed my hair. I thought this was strange behaviour but apparently that what they do over here to revive someone that is week or vomiting.

He was being a sweetie and tidied my house, washed up, cooked me super noodles and washed some of my clothing for me. I was very weak and spent most of the day sleeping.

Sunday 27th April- Port Harcourt Outing Service

2008-07-10T15:59:00.000+01:00

Port Harcourt outing service. I was in my shower by 6am this morning, as we needed to leave at 7 on the dot. An outing service is where you go to a church and speak about Amaudo and collect donations. The churches had been briefed on Amaudo for the past 1 week so we had high hopes. Apparently V/Rev had enjoyed himself because he was telling people about the visit and dining so I felt happy that he was happy and concluded he was probably exhausted in the car.
For the church I was going to I had two residents and was the accompany of Rev David the Project Comfort Co-ordinator, I travelled in a different car to David so did not actually get to talk to him that day. Church was long but I have to admit that the preacher for the sermon was rather good. I only looked at the clock twice in his hour plus long preaching slot. He kept talking about Jesus being the light of the world and explaining what darkness is. E.g. girls that put on traditional clothing and look very fine for church but the next day will be exposing their bodies in short skirts and low tops. E.g. when a wife asks a husband for 500N for milk and he takes money from his pocked in a way to hide the amount of cash he has from his wife so she won’t ask for any more. E.g. when your wife has got old and fatted after giving birth to all your wonderful children no longer being proud of that woman. Maybe looking at younger women or no longer keeping photos of the wife in the office and about the house for people to see. After 2 hours and 45 minuets of church I began to wonder when Amaudo would actually be recognised and we would be able to make a speech. I longed to enter the section for Reverends and speak to Rev David so I would sit easy. He read bible. I was shown to the church as a guest and new member of the church from Amaudo but still nothing said about Amaudo. In the end I gave up and walked to the front and asked to make a speech. I had low blood sugars and my speech was not planned out well so I just got up and spoke complete rubbish. I sat back down and spent the rest of the service hiding under my hat trying not to cry. I was so disappointed that I had spoken so badly at a time that was not the correct time.

Coming home I felt wrecked and pre-menstrual. The outing service was pretty successful even though one church decided to rearrange out visit.

Saturday 26th April- Bishops Son's White Wedding and dining wiht Orji Uzor Kalu Former Govener of Abia State!!!

2008-07-10T15:49:00.003+01:00

Saturday 26th April
Part two of the Bishops Son’s wedding: White Wedding (English Style). I can not really say I was in the mood for a wedding. I got out of the wrong side of bed and was feeling pretty grumpy. I have had a very busy week and had sacrificed last Saturday to watch them wed so why should I spend another day? I would rather sleep till 11 and then go meet Benson, go on a tour of his village and be introduced to the Former Governor of Abia State.

The wedding was pretty English if you ignored the processional music and the dancing up the isle…gosh. What was I expecting? If people dance and celebrate funerals in a joyful manner why would they start turning their wedding procession into a funeral march? The hymns were all old traditional English ones that I knew from growing up so I was able to enjoy knowing the tune and words so could sing well. I actually ended up enjoying myself until I checked the clock. One of the Revs was very funny in the service trying to hurry things up – he finished the choir and was advising them to leave the church. When they processed out they enjoy walking slow and sometimes even backwards. He was calling on them to hurry their dancing and to leave because there was lots more to do. Pat was there and Sister, and so was Doctor Hanz and his wife Mary. There were a couple of photographers mingling about snapping people and selling them their photographs for 50 naira. I snapped with Martha and the girls that work for Sister. I do not really like developing film cameras because you never know if you looked ok and to enjoy them I would either have to be blessed with a photogenic face or be willing to spend a lot of money to be able to get a nice photograph.

When the wedding was over we went to collect a gift for V/Rev Timothy to celebrate his induction. The persons house was close to Benson and Orji Uzor Kalu so we phoned him and arranged to meet up in the Former Governs Compound.

The compound was very grand. It was the kind of place that Japanese tourists go nuts over, wide lawns and 3 or 4 huge white buildings in a circle. All of the lawns were named; there was George Bush JR Lawn and the Bill Clinton fountain, Ndubisi lawn and whatever. I would have loved to snap these things but did not feel it would be correct behaviour, we met Benson in a large room with a marble floor and big sofas the air conditioning was on so strong it made my skin prickle. Benson offered to take me on a tour of the grounds so I accepted. The air was deliciously warm and sweet, the kind of air you only have when you go on holiday and you are fully relaxed. The guest house resembled a posh hotel, there was two places for meetings and offices, a swimming pool, tennis courts, play area for children and a BBQ plaza. How I wished that I could have stayed for a BBQ there was two modern tribal style huts with big carved wooden seats with animal hair on and a small bar section for taking cold beers and cocktails.

When we went back we were called for dinner. I entered a big dining room with a buffet set up reminiscent of my days working in Holland House Hotel. Benson put me second in the line ‘ladies first and all that’. When I got closer to the food my little heart sank. I was holding a china plate and a knife and fork but everything else was foreign. I hadn’t even seen half of the things on the table so I picked my friend garri & Augsi soup and sat down one place setting next to Orji Uzor Kalu so that he would not see me embarrassing myself. Then a man with a better sounding English accent than my own came over and asked me if I was ok. I said yes. Then he pointed out that most people would not be trying to eat garri with beans. So I sent my dinner away and tried again with help. I took fried rice, some unrecognisable yet pretty tasty section of chicken carcass and some vile coconut rice. Benson came and apologised for my embarrassment and we spoke about him coming to England and how he found our food. After dining we briefly caught Former Governor but he was in tennis gear so it was not really an appropriate time. I was not too bothered because I had enjoyed an interesting evening and was mulling over if I stood any chance of getting invited back to eat hamburgers and drink cocktails and white wine. Martha and Rev were quiet in the car and seemed pretty pissed off at how late it had got and how unproductive the evening was and how we still had someone to visit and why am I fussing about chieftaincy and there is armed robbers about this area and whatever.

Friday 25th April- My frist television appearance and shopping for Cheiftancy!!

2008-07-10T15:42:00.001+01:00

In the morning Benson took us to the Government House to meet the Chief of Staff to the Governor of Abia State and Deputy Chief of Staff to the Deputy Governor of Abia State. The Chief of Staff was a very friendly man who studied in the USA so had a jolly American accent. His was wearing bright traditional style clothing that looked like it was patterned with mitochondria. I was also wearing a traditional wrapper that I had made into an English style pencil skirt and a puffy sleeved shirt my own has yellow horses on jumping in green grass. He seemed to enjoy the effort I have been making and was happy to look through photos in my camera of our residents in Amaudo 1 and the ever so photogenic bunch at Amaudo 2. When we went to see the Deputy Chief of Staff to the Deputy Governor of Abia State, he was also very friendly and had spent time living in America. He was interested in the rehabilitation work going on in Amaudo because he himself spent some time working in a celebrity rehabilitation in America, I feel we could share some very interesting both sad and funny stories if it wasn’t for patient confidentiality. He decided that he would film us for the television and some photographers also came in to snap us for the paper. V/Rev did a speech on Amaudo and he then made a response. In his response he gave me a very long and grand introduction about how much I had sacrificed and suffered to leave my wonderful country and come through the dessert to suffer in Nigeria and blah blah blah…he made me blush because its not like that at all. I have not really suffered in Nigeria minus my throwing up at passport control, lost baggage, broken computer, broken I pod but other than that I have been comfortable. He praised my service and asked for people to be encouraged by my coming to Nigeria and to make plans to do voluntary work themselves here in Nigeria. He also promised to find me a suitably fine Nigerian man so that I will marry a Nigerian and come to live here. I couldn’t help laughing a little. I hope the camera didn’t catch my face at that point because it could be interpreted in the wrong way. Maybe I will marry a Nigerian. Who knows? I certainly seem to be given quite a large amount of choices over here. Two residents asked so far… Comfort said she will marry me for 100 Naira, Promise said he would marry me for 3,000 naira. Eunice the nurse said I am welcome to marry her brother and the list continues.

When we got back to Bensons office we spoke about my cheiftancy. He called two secretaries and a driver and told them to take me for lunch and then to the market to pick clothing and then to the tailor to get my measurements. They were under strict instruction to look after me well, give me good advice and not to allow me to walk any distance in the sun. The car must be used whenever we were going along a road. I should not enter bike. Travelling out in this manner felt very funny. It was like that stupid chick flick where the clumsy, geeky ugly girl gets told she is actually a princess and they start treating her like one and she goes ‘Oh deary me! What’s going on? How do I do this? What’s so special about me?’ For lunch I ate a chicken pie. It was funny being the only one eating and I got a bit self-conscious. Bensons girls were tall and slim with long legs and pretty faces. It felt especially funny for them to be dressed more English than I did. I began to wonder what I was looking like, if it was funny to be in Nigerian wrapper tailored clothing. Its quite ironic how greater lengths you can see some people here go to fixing weave-on to get Caucasian style hair, wearing western clothing, and its not uncommon to use bleach to lighten the skin. I can’t help wondering how they feel about me enjoying the wrappers, fixing attachments over my own hair (although it irritated me so much it only lasted 4 days!) and settling in to the Nigerian cuisine. I am always getting told off for scratching my bites because it makes them red and scatters my skin. I keep telling them that I do not really care, in England people do not admire my electric white skin and I would rather put on fake tan or tights before wearing a skirt. I am not sure if I should admit it but it does feel quite nice having my bright white skin admired I am so use to thinking it is a bad thing….will I reach for the fake tan as soon as the English summer times comes? I can not even really imagine being in England. My friend Laura Carter has just returned from her travels and said that English is miserable, cold, rainy, expensive, boring and she wishes she were still away.

When we got to the market we had our first disagreement. My chief schema was different to their own, I wanted to be wearing george (an expensive wrapper that is characterised either by looking similar to Scottish tartan or having embodied open flowers on) and a lace blouse. They said this was for older women and because I am young and petite I should wear a lace shirt and blouse. I was not convinced because I do not really like lace but I do not want to be laughed at so I phoned Benson. He said that if I was confused I should just buy both and decide on the day! He is too good to me. I was then taken to choose high heel shoes and a matching handbag. I feel slightly bad about how much money I am spending of his. I feel it will be a very grand day. When I got home I phoned mum and told her to send out my make up because the girls had serious concern I had left it all in England and that I would need it for my Cheiftancy. I have actually missed make up a hell of a lot. My skin has been very poor and coming out in spots and because I am white everyone notices it and for some strange reason I get people thinking that my misfortunate skin is an exciting topic of conversation. It can/does knock my confidence, but over here you just have to remember that it is not considered rude nor is it intended to cause any offence, it just takes some getting use to.

Tuesday 24th April -Going to Prision on Marthas Birthday

2008-07-10T15:32:00.005+01:00

Bro Philip promised to take me to the prison today with Chidi from CPP. I was feeling excited because I have not gone out with Bro Philip yet. 10 minuets later I was made to feel disappointed because Chidi let us down by telling us that the vehicle is double booked so he cancelled on us…..20 minuets later I was feeling determined because we decided that we would go all the way to Aba by public transport. We took a bike to Bende, a bus to Umuahia, then another bus to Aba and finally a bike to the prison. It was pretty hectic. Bus drivers here use bettered old mini vans as standard, they pack a criminal amount of people inside then drive like they stole it. I really hate buses. Nether the less I was feeling proud about our adventure and was not as bothered about public transport as I have been. Maybe I am becoming a Nigerian?

In the prison we saw some cases of prisoners. One brother and sister had got together and murdered somebody. Another man accidentally shot and killed a man whilst hunting. One man fought with his brother who then died later as a result of the blows he had received in the fight. The court seemed quite causal to me compared to my own experience of sitting in court in work experience when I was 15 and from the numerous ‘CSI Crime Scene Investigation’ and ‘Law and Order’ episodes I have watched. There was one sad case where a man was a police officer and they were coming to a scene where armed robbers had gone on a rampage of steeling, wrecking and raping. They found the man responsible and arrested him. A few days later they had to grant bail and he disappeared. His family made a petition to accuse the police of murdering the criminal and the police handed over their leader. Since 1994 they have done nothing to get him freed from jail.

When we got back Martha was in a very cheerful mood which made me happy because she has been down for the past few days. She dressed herself up beautiful and enjoyed the ceremony. It felt a little weird celebrating a birthday in such a formal way in the Chapel complete with prayers, a sermon and hymns and speeches but from her face you could tell she felt touched and appreciated the efforts made.
I made a speech of apology firstly about the damage done to the cake and secondly for the original appearance of the cake even before it got squashed,

We cut the cake and she had purchased 3 crates of mineral (coke/fanta/sprite/mountain dew etc…). So all the staff and residents ate cake and biscuit’s, drank mineral and we played music so everyone could dance and be happy. Comfort loves to dance a lot, I was upset not to see her face at the service so slipped out to find out what she was up to. I found her lying in bed feeling sick, she started whimpering when I tried to get her up and tempt her with cake and mineral. She said she would rather sleep which was very out of character because Comfort never ever goes to bed!

Wednesday 23rd April -Royal Cross Hospital

2008-07-10T15:30:00.001+01:00

Wednesday 23rd April
Today we went to visit Pat the nurse at Royal Cross Hospital. It was a good experience if slightly surreal. Going there was like stepping into the filming of an Oxfam aid appeal. I felt very lucky to be experiencing such a place and getting to walk around the wards in real life. The Hospital is short on staff but there is an amazing sense of team work and community where the nurses treat the patients but the families of the patients are the ones that cook for everyone and come together to do all of the washing to keep the going.

We stopped by Crunchies to get the cake. I was on the phone to Caroline & Kate from Amaudo UK at the time so left V/Rev T to go in on his own. The previous day he had been looking at wholesome fruitcake in loaves and circular shapes so I was horrified to open the box to find a frosted green and yellow cake. It was pretty hideous looking and I was worried what Martha would say because I know I had been laughing at those cakes so much when I first saw them. I suppose green on yellow may be better than pink on blue but I still was pretty shocked at his choice and he was surprised at my reaction.

When we got to Bende Rev David stopped our car and when Martha and V/Rev were doing something he entered the car to talk to me. When we saw Martha returning he lent over to open her door and lay his whole body over the cake pressing down at least 5cm. I shouted on him and was very cross. Now Martha not only has to have a green birthday cake she is also being given a squashed one.

I decided that I would loose the hair tonight now that Sister and Pat have both admired it. I half want to keep it to show Benson but he missed his chance on Tuesday. The texture is not like that of my own hair it is rough and itchy against my skin and your not able to wash your hair with attachments in because it makes it smell very bad. Pulling it out made me sympathise with how much pain all these girls are going through to keep themselves looking and feeling fine. I felt a guilty relief to be finding soft, smooth English hair underneath that I can run my fingers through and comb neatly in 60 seconds.

Monday 21st April - More Goats

2008-06-03T14:53:00.003+01:00

Monday the 21st of April
Adaze was looking sick this morning. Oku asked her if he could buy her biscuits and Lucozade but she refused. I decided she would take food from me because we are good friends so I tidied my house and made her jam sandwiches and biscuits and squash. I called her and said I needed her to do something for me. When she saw the food she was very pleased and asked if she was suppose to eat all. She ate up and even ate more sandwiches so I was pleased to see her feeling a bit brighter. She admired all the books in the guest house bookcase and told me she used to enjoy reading before she got sick. She said she loved to read Shakespeare and Chinua Achebe and named some other famous novels. Since becoming mentally ill she finds it hard to remember what she has just read and it makes her feel frustrated and unhappy. I lent her a book of African Tales because I felt they would be easy to read and she may even know the story already so it would be easy.

Rev Kenneth came to find me and said it was a good day for going to the market to buy some more goats to keep my golden goat company. We picked a baby girl and a baby boy. The boy was stubborn and the man had to carry him by his legs to get him into our car. I lead the girl to the car and she walked with me happily. Everyone though it was funny that I was buying a goat and asked how I would take it back to England, if I would buy it a plane ticket. The goats like each other a lot and were keen to get closely acquainted in the back of the car. I told Rev we would be hearing the patter of tiny hooves before long!

Shopping for goats

Sunday 20th April - Ants!

2008-05-27T14:14:00.003+01:00

Sunday the 20th of April
We were allowed to lie in because it is Sunday and church does not start until 10. Even Timothy enjoyed sleeping in till 7:30 instead of the usual 6:00 start. On my way to the shower room I saw some ants moving in a ribbon. They were not marching in a very straight line but they looked pretty organised so I wanted to get him to come and see if they are the dreaded soldier ants. I expected him to tell me I was being silly again and that they were just sugar ants but he confirmed my fears and said they were indeed soldier ants. He stepped over that line and found another… this one was actually leading into my bathroom! He opened the door and there were two massive circular gatherings of the blessed things. Rev made me come and look and bring my camera to take pictures for this blog. I was not happy going over to them and was very careful not to step on any in fear of any entering my towel to bite me. In the middle of the swarm you can see a pink blob. This is the remains of a lizard. Timothy got petrol and poured it all over them to kill them all.

Ants

The rest on smelling petrol decided it was not wise to go back into my shower room but remained stubbornly close because they did not want to loose their killing. I could not handle the thought of showering in that room so soon after witnessing such a frightful scene so I asked Martha if I could shower at hers. She said yes so I followed her over. As soon as we opened the door we were met by another long marching line of soldier ants. Unice the nurse and Martha’s neighbour told me that they had chased a lizard into the gap between her shutter and her blind and had killed it and eaten the whole thing even eating the bones. As their pathway is grassy and mine is better kept I decided I could see the ants better in my own house so would go home to shower. V/Rev Timothy was a bit annoyed that I did not feel safe to use my own shower room after he worked so hard to save me. He then picked up a dustpan and brush to sweep my shower room and washed away all of the remains of the ants and of the petrol and soaped the room. This was very kind, as I do not think I could have done it myself. I am too much of a wimp when it comes to ants. I think it justifiable because when I was 14 I was bitten by an ant and I had a bad reaction and then the swollen bite rubbed in my shoe and got infected so that my ankle swelled up and I was feverish and vomiting for a whole week.

After church Martha and I had set aside the rest of the day to plait extensions into my hair. Diane told me I have to try it and seeing as I was able to pick some up for just over the equivalent of £1.50 I decided I might as well. Unice kept us company and Mr Uwkuwe. I gave Unice my book to do some drawings in for me, I like her drawings they are very sweet and she enjoys doing it. I also gave Mr Uwkuwe my scrapbook to draw some people in because I know how much I loved the faces he drew on the House Parent training day.

Extensions

The finished result!

John Jeremiah asked to see me so I got Kelechi to take me to see John’s house in Okapedi. We met him on the way down, he was carrying a walking stick so I laughed at him. He said it is what you should wear at a traditional marriage but I still felt he looked silly with a stick as he is only 30. It was nice to walk through villages again, usually I am either in Amaudo or in town somewhere. Town is pretty hectic and the traffic is a major form of stress to me. Cars do not follow other cars in neat lines like we do in England. They perpetually race and cut each other up as if being fast will somehow compensate for the physical state that their vehicle is in. You see so many battered cars and wonder how they are even on the road still. Driving in Nigeria is a mixture of a car racing video game and the board game monolopy. Drivers do everything they can to stay in front, some will even purposely drive in the middle of the road to prevent you from passing so that they can show off the power of their motor. Whenever we are on a clear stretch of road we will travel at speeds of 140 km/h. The main problem I have with this is that Rev does not like to use the air conditioning, instead he insists we wind down the ‘glass’ to the bottom and let the cold air rush in. This can lead to one-hell of a stiff neck when we travel far. The reason that driving is like Manolopy is how littered the roads are with police, road safety, government workers, special police that are better trained and wear green trousers….all calling over vehicles to collect bribes as if they do not collect a salary. The police have guns and batons and the government men have sticks. I do not mind them much because although they spend all day collecting bribes they are descent enough to all recognise that Amaudo and respect the services we provide. Amaudo vehicles never have to pay bribes.

John showed me his house but chased me away after 30 minuets because he wanted to make sure I would be home before sunset. John and Kelechi were very worried that if I was not home by sun set then the welfare officer would be very cross. They fear welfare officer a lot! John was even crying to me not to tell welfare officer that I went out to see him so that he would only be cross at Kelechi. He was even telling me he was at risk of looking his job. I found them both very funny because V/Rev Timothy has been so welcoming to me and I do not understand how people can fear him so much. I told him that the welfare officer knows I am a sensible girl so will not be worried if I have gone for 30 minuets and that I had already told him that I was walking out to meet him.

Saturday 19th April - Wedding day

2008-05-27T14:02:00.002+01:00

Saturday the 19th of April
This was the day of the Bishop’s son’s traditional wedding. We aimed to leave the house at half 6 so I had to get up at half 5. We had to bring a vehicle and the Helping Hands School bus to be able to transport everyone that the Bishop had asked us to take. We arrived at his house at half 9 so find that nobody was even around. It even took some minuets for the Bishop to even come downstairs to greet us! I suppose I should have realised that everyone would be working on Nigerian timing and its only V/Rev Timothy, Martha and I that get flustered over when the clock tells us we should be somewhere and we may not be able to obey the clock.

I like the Bishop that’s son wedding it was. His name is Bishop Foster Ekeleme, he is the one that lead the 4 hour church service at the end of Synod and promised to get me a husband. He greeted me warmly and called me his daughter and said he has found my husband. His skin is as black as charcoal and I will meet him before the day is through. He is a very funny man.

We spent a disappointingly long time in his house waiting for all the guests to turn up that we have been asked to be in charge of bringing. We came with our centre vehicle and the Helping Hands School bus. I was a bit annoyed to hear that it is Amaudo money that is being spent on the petrol. The Bishop is not going to sort us out with fuel despite Amaudo being a charity and him being the chairman of Amaudo who just the other day we were crying to about our financial crisis. Oh well, I suppose it can be their wedding gift, as Amaudo most certainly cannot afford one of those anymore!

We travelled for one and a half hours to a small village outside of Aba. I have got accustomed to sitting up front in the car to enjoy the view but we were taking 6 people so being the smallest I could not expect to enjoy that luxury today. I was packed in the back next to Martha, then the groom, then another Reverend, my friend……I kept trying to sit on the edge of my seat and get on the floor but I found no comfort in either. I was tempted to sit on someone but it was much too hot and way too far to be practical.

When we arrived lots of people were still preparing this and that. We went into a room and broke Kola. We drank mineral and ate lunch.

Lunch

For the service the bride comes out and you put money on her. She goes away. Comes back, put on more money. She has to find the man she wants to marry and she gives him wine. Brings him to her parents and they all drink wine. The couple dance and we shower them with money. The Wedding is over.

Friday 18th April - part 2 - Chief Caroline

2008-05-27T14:01:00.000+01:00

Friday the 18th of April - part 2
I had written up the Proposal for the House Parent Sponsorship funding and fond some pages of blog that I had written and lost so felt eager to get to email. V/Rev had to go to town to chase money so he drove us into town. We had decided to leave at half 7 but the heavy rain delayed us until almost 10. Martha is trying to get a place sponsored to study her Masters in either England or America so had a lot of things to look at on the computer. I had finished my emails and was getting hungry. When V/Rev came in to check up on us I asked him to take me with him so I could buy some bread and jam to stop my stomach from crying. He was going to meet a man about his induction. I am beginning to realise now the importance of the Very that is placed before the Reverend and am trying to make sure I use his title because it, and the induction party, are very important to him. The man he was seeing is called Benson and he is a management committee member of Amaudo. He is also a lawyer and a judge and is working administratively to organise other judges. I am still not entirely sure what all this means but I just recognise him to be an important man who must lead an extremely busy and hectic life. Anyway Benson welcomed me into his office and sat me down next to V/Rev and started asking the usual polite questions about who I am, where I am from and what I am doing in Amaudo. He seemed pretty impressed that I have spend the last 8 months making money to fund myself and come out to Amaudo at the age of 19. I told him that I enjoyed working hard for the money because I got a lot of different experiences with out even leaving Bristol. The Hotel work was the most challenging but I think I have learned a few valuable lessons from it. My visit rather took over the point of the meeting, Benson asked me to come to his village and the more we spoke the grander my visit to his village became.

First it was to see the 300 destitute people he himself cares for out of his own pocket.

Secondly he asked if I would care to see some traditional dancing and I said yes (of cause! I would actually really LOVE to see it)

Thirdly he offered to give me the title of Chief to celebrate my achievement of coming over to Nigeria as such a small girl. I asked him if it was ok for a woman to be a Chief and if I had to be a LoLo (pronounced lor-la) which means princess or wife to an Eze (king). He told me that Chief would be fine because I must have the heart of a man to be able make this trip.

Being told I would become Chief was very exciting to me. He said he would get his secretaries to take me to the tailor and buy me a shirt and some George to wear, this is an expensive cloth that is worn by Chiefs and important people. He would also get me a crown to wear and an animal skin hand fan. These were all the details that were delighting me and making me to feel very excited about the 11th of May which is the proposed date for my Chief title celebration. The details that made V/Rev Timothy happy were the location that it would be held in the former governor of Abia States home. 13 Eze’s would be invited and it would be a big occasion. Seeing as Amaudo is the reason why I have come to Nigeria and Benson is an Amaudo management member this is an absolute blessing of an event in which to talk about the work of Amaudo and to collect ‘big money’ and try and collect agreements to monthly donations.

I think I am forgiven for scattering* the meeting because of the amazingly fortunate bit of good luck that came out of it. When I got back to the centre I called my mum and told everyone else that I could find. Me being me forgot to mention all the important parts and only spoke about the very exciting parts like the new dress and crown and the fact I will get a new title of Chief. It was only when V/Rev Timothy told people that they really understood my joy to be a good thing and a joy they should be sharing in.

*Scattering is used to describe messing anything up. You can scatter my hair or the story I am telling or my belongings… It is like the word picking. You use scatter to describe any disorganisation, just as picking is anything you take/bring/collect/buy

Friday 18th April - E-mail

2008-05-27T13:17:00.001+01:00

Friday the 18th of April
I went for email again. I had lost some blog I had written because I saved it in a funny place and wanted to make sure it got to Amaudo UK quickly. There is already almost a weeklong delay between when the event happens and when I am free to look for a vehicle to join to go into town with the laptop to be able to send it. You would not believe how much of a headache email really is because it is so easy turning on your computer on the other end and getting a high speed broadband connection putting on the kettle and sitting in a comfortable chair. At my end I have to leave the house at half 7 or 8ish to drive for one and a half hours along some pretty frightful roads scattered with pot holes and dangerous drivers. Once in the internet café you realise that there is no need to call it a café as there is nowhere to buy drinks or food. The internet consists of two rooms one quite large one with rows and rows of pc’s and another small cupboard with a fan where people that have laptops are able to plug them in and perch on some precarious looking chairs. There are two complete chairs in that room. They have very small seats and look like they were made for children. I like to sit on them and they are mostly kept free, I assume this is because big men do not trust them to carry their weight. I finished my email pretty fast and was feeling hungry. Martha is trying to sort out getting her Masters organised so needed to spend quite lot of time working. Something had angered the generator so it was complaining rather noisily. When V/Rev Timothy dropped in to check on progress, I asked him to take me with him so I could have a chance to pick some food before coming back to Martha. I wanted to go to Winners Supermarket because I know they sell cherry jam and Pringles. He was on his way to go and meet a manager of Amaudo called Benson to talk about his induction ceremony to celebrate becoming a Very Reverend. This means he has been a Reverend for 10 years. The induction is an official institution and a service of empowerment and is usually conducted by the Bishop to authenticate your appointment as a presbyter. During in the service gifts and financial support is given to the minister to enable him to execute a project. Some will use this money to buy a car and others will try and build their family house… you can tell I have had to be told this quite a few times over because its not something I am use to having to understand.

Anyway the purpose of the visit became obscured because Benson was more interested on how this small girl had got out of England, come to Amaudo, and was now sitting in his office.

Thursday 17th April - A Lazy Day

2008-05-27T13:06:00.002+01:00

Thursday the 17th of April
I came back from CPP feeling very tired so decided to not set my alarm clock. I slept in till 8:30 which is a very luxurious lie in because church is from 7 to 7:30 and so to bath before church I have been used to setting my alarm for 6:10. I found out that Helping Hands School was not on so decided to do all my washing. Today I would relax and have a lazy day. I was being so lazy I decided I could not be bothered to carry the water to my house to wash so I carried my washing down to the pump and cleaned all of it.

I wanted to see Ungotchi and my beautiful golden goat and we went to Kelechi to find out what was going on with her. We were having a nice chat so he invited me to spray bedbugs with him. Rev Peter heard my voice and came out to greet me rubbing a black soap on his hair wearing a towel. He likes to play fight with Kelechi and told him that I should rather spend the day in his company. He said Kelechi’s skin is too dark for me. So I pointed out that Kelechi’s skin is very tight and is covering a very muscular body. And that his own skin even though it is light I do not value colour over youth. We have a lot of funny conversations. Nigerians seem to love insulting each other. You can call someone fat and even threaten to beat someone or chop their hands off then he or she will soon laugh and the next minute they will be friends again. I told him that I could not be choosing between his company and spending the day with Kelechi spraying bed bugs because the insecticide would cause harm to my lungs and that he was currently only wearing a towel as he was dying his grey hairs black. And that the only reason I had come was to find out where my lovely goat had got to so I could check up on it!

My lovely goat!

Ungotchi and I swept and tidied up the goat house and made it neat and clean for the goat to enjoy when it came back from a hard day of grazing. I am planning on getting another female goat and then a male so Amaudo can start breeding goats. I called my mum and asked her to see if she can get the money. She said she is pretty sure she can get it as it will only cost £30 to buy the goats as we already have a house that only needs a quick tidy and a new door hinge and the goat farm will be up and running again! The income generation prospects for this project are very high. It will cost £30 to get the male and the female, a goat’s pregnancy will last three months and even when a goat is quite small it can fetch 4 thousand at market. A big goat can get from 6 to 8 thousand. The goats will cost very little to feed because they can eat the mango leaf and the grasses that grow around the centre. The other good thing about the goat farm means that it is a source of free meat for the residents so this will keep them very happy, as we do not often get to eat meat in the centre.

I asked John Jeremiah to come round today to bring me a document he had written for me when I was questioning him for stories he had from working at Amaudo. He had missed the point and written me an essay on Cerebral Palsy. It was written quite jumbled with the pages stuck together with tape in a way that made me tease him. The content was actually very good and I enjoyed reading it. As someone that knows very little about the condition I feel very pleased with how hard John is trying in his new job. He has only just taken the job at Project Comfort, when I first came to Amaudo he was the friendly barber that showed me round the workshop and showed me the farm.

Evan from Project Comfort was also around so I asked him to join us. They kept me company for a while and I showed them the scrapbook I have been making and fed them juice and chocolate biscuits. I like their company but they refused to stay long in-case the Welfare Officer (V/Rev Timothy) was to come back and find them in my house. I told them that they were being silly and that I had already told him I had invited John last night and he said it was fine. Everyone here is very scared of Welfare Officer. Kelechi even said it was his fear of the Welfare Officer that stopped him from coming to talk to me until Diane told him that I needed him to fetch me the snake shedding. I sent them both away with books to borrow and paper to return to me when they had drawn me beautiful drawings to keep in my scrapbook.

Wednesday 16th April - Owerri

2008-05-27T13:02:00.000+01:00

Wednesday the 16th of April
It is exactly one month today that I will be travelling to Owerri Airport to start my journey back to my house in England. Ironically today I was to drive out to Owerri Airport to see Cecil off because he is going back to the UK for three weeks. Friday was the driver again, same as the three trips made to collect me and my missing luggage last month. It will also be Friday that drops me off on my way home.

I was not just going to Owerri Airport to see Cecil off but because it joined up nicely with the plans of CPP (Community Psychiatric Programme). I got told I would be following Grace to go and sell psychiatric drugs. When we arrived at our destination I followed her. It turned out to be a meeting about educating people in the local community about mental illness and to raise awareness with the elders, Chiefs and Ezes. The whole meeting was conducted in Igbo from start to finish, so I only learned the topic after 4 hours of discussion when the meeting finally came to a close. It was a hot day and I was frustrated not being able to understand anything that was said. One man got up and said “Oh we have an English visitor hello, good day, sorry you have not been able to follow anything. I speak English very well but if I speak in English to my elders and to the Eze then it would be very rude and mean that I have forgotten myself as a Nigerian. I suggest you start learning Igbo or get a translator.” I guess that told me. I felt it was slightly unfair as I am only here for two months but he has got a point that English people are very bad at learning languages. I have decided it’s because we can get away with it because English is understood in so many places that we rarely feel the pain of not being able to communicate.

Once we were moving away from the meeting I began asking Grace questions. She told me that when the village people started standing up and asking questions they were talking about disabled and mentally ill children. One woman even admitted to keeping her daughter in chains because she did not know how else to handle her. One of the men giving speeches was a psychiatric doctor so promised to see her daughter after the meeting and said it was not good to keep her in chains and she should bring her daughter to his clinic and he will help teach her how to manage the child. Hearing things like this really brakes my heart about the lack of funding for the Human Rights section of Amaudo.

Tuesday 15th April - A Day Out In Town

2008-05-27T12:51:00.004+01:00

Tuesday the 15th of April
I woke up feeling very sick. I have decided this is probably the cause of my extremely grumpy and anti-social mood swing last night. I dragged myself out of bed without showering and moped into dining. I have not eaten beans for breakfast since I have come here because it feels like a very funny thing to eat for breakfast and I would rather drink tea and dunk bread in it as Diane taught me to do or eat biscuits with it. Success and Kelechi saw I was looking droopy and came to comfort me. This is the first time I have really appreciated talking to Success using him as a psychologist. We usually just make light conversation and chat like normal. He told me I was probably suffering as a result to trying to adjust into this new environment and was feeling some stages of institutionalisation. He said he passed through several stages before he felt fully settled and had been expecting me to have a ‘shock day?’ ‘Brake down?’ ‘Exhaustion period?’…I don’t know what to call it. Anyway he said he was going into town so he would take me on his bike. We could spend as long as I wanted sending emails to my friends and family and we could go to the market to pick up my dresses and go to café’s and do everything I fancied to make me feel better. Kelechi was also being very sweet and although he is not in the same position to help me out I do like going to see him. He makes funny little jokes and has a giggly laugh, sometimes he acts daft in a way that makes me think of my friend Tom Heller. Tom’s mum gave me colouring books to use in Helping Hands & Wonderful school and the children that come to visit, paper and crayons, quite a lot of clothes to wear in Amaudo and to leave for any resident who fancied them. There is one colourful skirt I like a lot, I feel slightly bad that my using it is making it fade but Amaudo is often donated clothing and has a whole store cupboard full of clothing for the residents at the moment. If anyone hearing this was considering bringing clothing and is now feeling put off do not worry! It is always being used, so is good that we have so much because it means we can afford to burn all of a residents clothing if bed bugs enter their house. Also the residents love getting new clothes to wear just like everyone else so new clothing is used for motivation and rewards for good behaviour.

Anyway Success walked me to my house and said he would wait for me to take my bath. He went to the shop to get me an energy drink to raise my blood sugars. Whilst he was gone I went into the bush and threw up several times. It was like eating those beans in reverse, and I really did not enjoy those peppery beans so early in the morning! Throwing up made me feel instantly a lot perkier and I enjoyed going on the bike and getting lots of breeze. I opened up a lot of emails. I have been getting quite a lot from my granny which I have enjoyed opening. She always makes me feel happy when I read it. Sometimes she will tell me something very funny and I will laugh with her and other times I just feel happy because I can imagine her saying or doing what she is describing. Today she told me she had a new film and decided to watch the end before watching the rest of the film to reduce the suspense in the film. This is also how she likes to read books. I laughed out loud in the Internet ‘café’ but Success did not really appreciate what was funny.

I went to collect my clothing from the market. I am getting use to it now and decided I would be able to find my tailor by myself. I get called ‘Onyeocha’ a lot and O-ee-bo and Misses White, Success has not been outside of Amaudo with me before so found it funny how much hassle I got from being white. ‘Mrs USA come buy bed sheet?’…. ‘Misses White do you want shoe?’ After walking around in circles for at least 40 minuets I admitted defeat and we called Martha for help. I made a promise to myself to try and learn where things are in future.

Kelechi gave me a Chop Chop to try. Trying all these new fruits is quite entertaining. Chop Chop has the taste of milkshake sour apple flavour. This feels very weird getting such tastes from a natural fruit.

Eating chop chop

Kate from Amaudo UK also phoned me today in-between coming back from town and the eating of Chop Chop. She told me that the money had been sent and that she is doing so much work back in the UK and is chasing up lots of sponsors but it just takes so much time to finalise these things. I felt relieved that they are working very hard. It is not that I did not think they were working but I just felt glad to hear how hard they are working. I told them about my House Parent Sponsorship idea and they said it sounds very good and they will need it explained fully in writing before they can do anything but that it is a very smart idea. I was feeling so happy Martha and V/Rev came back to find me skipping about Amaudo. Chop Chop was like a celebration reward.

Monday 14th April - House Parent Sponsorship

2008-05-27T12:48:00.000+01:00

Monday the 14th of April
Today was an Internal Management meeting. My task of the meeting was to make notes on the financial crisis and to write a document to be presented to the board and to Amaudo UK. I will not go into detail but I came away from the meeting with a very heavy heart.

When I got back to my house I was determined to work out my idea of House Parent Sponsorship. I want it to act as a means of getting funds that will be secured to pay for everything the residents need such as maintenance to their rooms, all their soap, toilet tissue, bags for holding clothing and other such things. (For details please see Tuesday 8th April blog entry on House Parent training day). This way work will never be delayed if a leek appears or if bed bugs appear because they know that there is regular money coming in. This means it is safe to do the work and you will never end up choosing between fixing a leek and buying rice for dinner or fuel for the vehicles. Another good thing about the fund will be that it will free up the donations that were previously used for the soap and sanitary equipment and let them be moved to other places such as money for the farm or money to go towards other income generation proposals.

I spent the afternoon writing up the document about the worst case scenario budgeting strategy. It is grim stuff with impress being cut in half or more than half. Unless monthly money can be secured fast then Amaudo is in for rough times facing drastic impairment of their vital work. I am feeling very angry that the government has not kept their promise of fixing the Itumbauzo road that leads up to Amaudo. Every time I rock and roll down my way down the road, driving sometimes at a 47 degree angle, I feel cross that the promise has not yet been fulfilled. Now the rainy season is coming there is more sand and more damage to the road. Soon we will be getting stuck in the mud.

I felt very heavy this evening and wanted to disappear. I am getting fed up of being noticed so much for being white. I do not even like my skin colour it is too pale and all kinds of insects come to cover it in bites of different shapes and sizes. I tried to go for a walk in the dark up to the junction and back just so I could use my leg muscles but security stopped me and took me back to the centre. They said I had to have the permission of Cecil to be allowed out!? Talking to Cecil did actually do me a lot more good than stomping about in the dark would have done so I guess I am grateful.

Sundat 13th April - financial difficulties

2008-05-27T12:43:00.001+01:00

Sunday the 13th of April
Church today was quite worrying. Rev Kenneth’s prayers were the things that worried me the most. He was praying for the survival of Amaudo and that god will not let work that has been done be stopped by financial difficulty and prayed for the work to continue. Everyone kept saying that not in my lifetime I could not see Amaudo fall apart with my own eyes - it must not be allowed. So I began to feel pretty scared about what financial troubles lie ahead. I know that for the past three years Amaudo has been paying staff salary with a monthly donation of £2,000 (two thousand pounds) from three kind individuals of Saint Luke’s Hospital Group their names being; Dr Chuma Igbokwe, Dr Jackie Tweedie and Dr Obi Mbamalih. The donation was first proposed to be going for one year but they extended it until March this year. When the current exchange rate gives you 233 Naira to the pound then you can see how much that money translated into and how hard it is going to be to gather money to fill the hole each month.

This week’s doctor loves Amaudo and although I haven’t written about him yet he is very intelligent and said in ward round he suggested the jerky walking of Pa Pa Isaac and another resident may be an indication of catatonic schizophrenia. Digressing from the point, the doctor came to church and listened to the preaching and the praying and felt moved to pledge N10,000 (ten thousand naira) a month. This translates to £46 a month and is a very generous but manageable donation. We also heard that house parent Steve lost his wife last night. Everyone moved over to his house after church to pray for him and sing a couple of hymns. Rev Peter read a bible passage and Steve seemed to be comforted by having everyone come to him to say their apologies.

I called up home worried about Amaudo and got Dad to transfer £500 from the Amaudo savings account across to us in Nigeria to help out for this month.

Saturday 12th April - My Golden Goat

2008-05-19T17:26:00.002+01:00

Saturday the 12th of April
Plan for the day
1) Meet the Archbishop Uko
2) Go to the art gallery V/Rev Timothy has been going on about

We decided to see the Bishop first but he was not around so we moved onto visiting the art gallery. Perhaps gallery was the wrong word to use as what I found was a series of shops where men were working to produce lots of carvings and those kinds of African arts you find on mantle pieces of people that have been to Africa. There was also some tourist tack. I was slightly sad there was no gallery with paintings in so decided we should take a lunch brake.

We went to Mr Bigs, which is another fast food joint. I had bought a doughnut in Crunches last week and there was so little jam I vowed never to buy another doughnut from that place. I asked the girl if they had much jam and she said no. I decided to only take a drink whilst Martha and Rev had meat pies. I began to feel hungry and remembered that Diane had told me they do good burgers.

Hi can I have a beef burger please? –No sorry
Can I have a chicken burger please? - No sorry

I looked for chips on the menu and they did not even seem to feature. I asked for an ice cream but the machine was not working. I said “gosh this place has no right to be a fast food place if there is no burger, no chicken nugget, no ice cream…” the man said “sorry, sorry, the place will be fine when you come again.” I told him “I would be very sad if I do not get to try a burger from Mr Bigs before I go because I have heard their burgers to be highly praised.” In the end I gave up and had a Spanish omelette that was hiding under a different name.

I bought myself a carving of an African boys head and got Martha a necklace and earrings for her birthday on the 24th of April. I think she is 29 now so will be turning 30. We then went off to see the Archbishop.

When we went to Arch Bishop Uko’s house V/Rev told him about Amaudo and I went to sit by him and show him photographs. He said we should phone him after the 27th and he would arrange a time he could come and visit Amaudo. When we left he gave us 5 massive yams and even untied one of his golden goats and gave it to us. I was very pleased to be given a goat. I have always enjoyed animals and use to love going to the farm to pet the goats and baby sheep so I am looking forward to feeding and looking after my beautiful golden goat.

Me and my golden goat!

Friday 11th April - Rev David's Son

2008-05-19T17:24:00.000+01:00

Friday the 11th of April
Today we planned to go to another Synod to look for more money for Amaudo. However we were stopped as we received the news that Rev David the Project Comfort Coordinator had lost his youngest son to a fever in the night. Everyone from Amaudo 1 all jumped into a vehicle and drove over to help out the family. Rev David was actually away from home so it took some time before was even able to hear the news. I did not think it my place to go so I stayed in and worked on the computer. I spent most of the day in hiding on the computer trying to give everyone space and not get in the way. The body had to be put in the ground that day because he was too small to put in the mortuary and spend big money on carrying the body back to the family village and giving him a proper burial. Instead Amaudo 1 and Project Comfort workers all came to support the family and have a small service. I decided to come and see the child off. He was a very beautiful little boy. When I came they had just finished washing the body. Then they wrapped it in a cloth and we sang hymns and prayed. Then the body was placed in a large cardboard boy and buried 6 foot under ground in the corner of the farmland.

Thursday 10th April - Wonderful School

2008-05-19T16:39:00.004+01:00

Thursday the 10th of April
James the driver woke me up today knocking on my door. He was pleased because he had found a snake shedding and remembered that Diane had told him to look out for one to replace the one I lost when Godwin came and tided up the house for her when I was out. It is a lovely skin and I am going to draw it and stick it in my sketchbook. As it is only the shedding I hope customs allow it or do not notice it because it will be scrambled with a lot of other cuttings and rubbish when my sketchbook goes through the scanner. I went to the Wonderful School again and we joked around a lot. It is the last time it appears on my programme so I felt slightly sad. I wish to find the time to come back and visit. Happiness is doing such a great job. She told me when she came if you gave a child a pen and paper then they just scribbled round and round in circles. Now she has two of them that can write the whole alphabet and the rest are trying hard to work on individual letters and the beginnings of the alphabet and one, two, three, four. I had bought a football in the market so that we could have a good kick around. Isaac was especially happy as he told me his favourite thing about school is getting to play ball. Everyone was in such good spirits. I was using a local Okada boy because all of the Amaudo bikes are currently spoiled and are off to the garage. He turned up promptly at 1, I think he is scared I am a harsh lady because I said I would not pay him for dropping me off at Amaudo 2 until I was safe back at Amaudo 1 and he had completed his job.

Wonderful School Pupils

I still felt pretty lively when I got back. I went for a walk with Catherine. She told me all the mangos would be ripe on Wednesday, all the cashews would be ripe on Wednesday and that she would be going back to her family on Wednesday. Whilst we were walking I spotted a ripe cashew and let her eat the fruit. Rev Peter decided he wanted my company so offered to take me to his village and show me his family house. He is from just down the road by Helping Hands School. He has a cocoa farm and I took photos of the tree and the seed and when the seeds had been left the dry. I did not like the taste of the fresh seed it reminded me of eating chop chop which tastes like weird milkshake so not something you expect from fruit. The dried seed tasted more like chocolate but very bitter and quite nice.

Cocoa seeds drying

Tasting fruit

Picking fruit

Wednesday 9th April - Stuck in Amaudo

2008-05-19T15:34:00.001+01:00

Wednesday the 9th of April
I was up early ready to go to CPP (Community Psychiatric Programme). I was expecting Friday to pick me up at half past seven. Unfortunately he was tied up looking after a Bishop so would not be coming to collect me. Even if I got into town he was the driver put in charge of the movement of vehicles that day so all work was off. I was quite annoyed as I have not been out of Amaudo since Saturday and haven’t gone for email for quite a long time now. I decided to walk around and found Kelechi working, preparing an area of farm to plant melon. He had about 15 male residents all working with him cutting at the weeds and clearing the land. I spent the rest of the day working on the Annual Report. I worked hard so my day was not wasted.

Monday 7th & Tuesday 8th April - House Parent Training Day

2008-05-19T15:23:00.004+01:00

Monday the 8th of April
Kelechi told me he lost a brother today and had gone to see him in the morgue. Martha said brother does not always mean biological and that this brother was actually a cousin and not too close. I still felt for Kelechi because going to a morgue could never be easy.

I spent the day relaxing and doing washing. I swept the house and did some work to my scrapbook, it is looking fine. I have stuck in everything from my visa application form to my fist pure water bag.

Catherine asked me to marry her and take her to England. She said she has 100 Naira to marry me with. I told her woman could not marry woman so I am sorry I can not be her wife. She laughed at me. She enjoys joking about marrying people. She also asked Very Rev Timothy to marry her. He said she must be dressing fine and bathing fine and changing her clothes before he could even think of marrying her.

Tuesday the 8th of April
Cecil ran a House Parent training day. I decided I would become closer to Amaudo if I attended the training so I can have a better understanding of the work done.

The job of a house parent is that of a parent. They have to make sure their resident’s bath, tidy their rooms, take their medicine, eat their meals, attend church and work hard in their workshop. They have to get to know their residents and make them feel comfortable living in Amaudo and create a caring relationship with each of their residents so that if they have any problems they will go to the house parent.
We started the day by drawing pictures of our jobs. Two of the pictures I liked very much. One had the house parent surrounded by his residents and they were drawn in a very stylised way. The second was a fancy picture of a proud farther, which was in another stylised manner with a wig and trousers like King Henry VIII.

We split the training into House Keeping and House Parenting and talked about the problems.

Problems faced by House Keeping
- A lot of residents will not wash clothes unless they are told to. Some do not have adequate storage for their clothes once they are clean. E.g. wall hanger with coat hangers on, any shelving or big bags to store them in.
- Residents need to sweep their houses regularly.
- The houses are getting old and some have cracks. All would benefit by being repainted. It has been suggested that spending the extra money to use gloss paint is important as you can wash it and it lasts longer.
- New residents may excrete and urinate inside of the house because they no longer understand the concepts of home and toilet after living on the street for so long and because they are mentally sick.
- The foams residents sleep on are getting old and have been attracting bed bugs. The pillows are old, as are pillowcases and the bed sheets.
- Females have problems with their menstrual cycle because they do not always use pads. This can be because their house parent may not have pads to give, the resident may not have pants to use to keep the pad in place, or the residents sometimes are not in a fit mental state to use them.
- Underwear in general is a problem, as it is not often donated.

The Standard of House we will fight to keep.
1. Gloss painted walls
2. No bed bugs
3. Several buckets for fetching water
4. Storage for clothes e.g. wall hangers and bags
5. Brooms for sweeping and each house parent should have a long broom for sweeping away cobwebs.
6. All residents need light so each house should have a lantern for if we do not have power or the electrics have a problem in their home. We should try and fix all electrics.
7. Clean shower room and toilet
8. Soap dishes to keep their soap in and razor blades for shaving and cutting nails.
9. Slippers (flip-flops) must be kept in the rooms and towels/ wrappers.
10. Shutters and blinds must be kept well so they open and do not have any holes in.

How we plan to solve our problems.
We wish to buy…
· Maintenance work for all of the buildings to repair cracks and leeks
· Gloss paint
· Buckets
· New beds, new bed sheets, new pillows and new pillowcases for all houses.
· Things for keeping clean; soap & soap dishes, sponges, razor blades, towels, moisturiser (this is VERY IMPORTANT in dry season!), toilet tissue, toothbrushes & toothpaste and more slippers (flip flops)
· Things to keep things tidy; wall hangers, clothing bags and brooms*
· Detol for bathing and cleaning cuts and grazes. And insecticide to kill insects and bed bugs.
· Lanterns for all rooms
· Underwear for males and females.

*Brooms we may be able to get made in our rehabilitation workshop.

BRING BACK COMMUNITY WORK
We need to discuss and organise bringing back community work. This is where residents are organised to clean under the supervision of their house parent. Different residents are given different tasks. So one will clean the shower rooms and toilets for all the residents in their block. One will wash all the bed sheets for all the residents in their block. One will sweep a scrub the rooms. This needs to happen every month if not twice a month. Residents should be encouraged and reminded to sweep their rooms daily. We must organise and keep a rota to make sure this works.

House Parenting Issues
Problems faced by House Parents when dealing with residents
Ø Abuse of staff. Verbal abuse and insults, physical violence. On rare occasions stealing.
Ø Refusing to take drugs
Ø Refusing to bath and keep clean. This includes refusing to wash and change clothes and bed sheets.
Ø Urinating and excreting in the house
Ø Laziness & stubbornness
Ø Residents may try to escape (mostly new ones)

Problems faced by House Parents in every day work
Ø Need a torch for checking up on the residents in the night
Ø They need a residential driver in case of an absconder or in an emergency
Ø Co-operation of security and management to make sure that all residents are brought to dining, workshop, chapel, community work and their weekend movie viewing.
Ø Staffs need some time off because at the moment they are on duty 24 hours a day and working 7 days a week. There needs to be planned off and on times so when a member of staff is on duty he or she is fresher for working. It would be best to try and arrange both a male and a female house parent sharing duty times.
Ø Co-operation between house parents so if one is away then others will care for their residents. The on duty house parent must be readily available when a resident has any need on his or her shift

Things we should buy or try and get funding for.
· Good torches to be used by House Parents to check up on Residents in the night time
· A residential driver
· A new vehicle to be used for home visits that are an important step in being ready to go home
· Money to support further House Parents training days (costs of printing booklets, refreshments, paper and pens)

After the training I got chatting to Kelechi and Unice and asked them to come round to my house for tea and to chat about the day. It felt nice having them come to my house and eat and drink with me, I felt like we were now proper friends. Unice drew me some pictures of animals to watch out for like the giant millipede and the poisonous centipede. Martha told me a story that a centipede sat in the kettle in someone’s house and the mum made tea and everyone in the family drank the tea and then everyone died. She also told me about soldier ants. They are ants that move in an organised line and they are arranged with killing ants that go out and organise themselves to kill food to feed all the ants in the colony so something like a lizard. If you accidentally stand on their line then they creep up your leg and into your clothes then they suddenly start to bite you. Sometimes a whole swarm will enter a house and you can find them eating a whole stew if they come across one. When you see them you have to put kerosene to block their line or cover them in petrol to kill them. I really do not want to see soldier ants at all! I asked Bro Philip and he said I will meet them, and Very Rev Timothy and he also said I would meet them but he will be there to protect me.

Sunday 6th April - Nigerian Humour!?

2008-05-19T15:20:00.004+01:00

Sunday the 6th of April
Today was the last day of Synod so we went to Bende for the church service and for the Bishop to bless the Helping Hands School Bus. All the women were very well turned out in bright wrappers and big shinny headscarves so I felt a bit scruffy. I had wanted to wear my new dress but as it was not ready I did not have time to plan a good outfit. Pat the nurse was at the service and Dr Hans, so with Cecil and I, there were a total of four white people. The Bishop thought he was very lucky and prayed for the whites in several of his prayers. Sermons were given in English and then in Igbo, so as you can imagine it took quite a lot of time. The total length of the service was 5 hours and 7 minuets.

I was smart and had brought a bottle of juice with me. I cannot remember if I have written this but whenever there is an offering people dance to the offering box and snake around the church in a manner I have only ever done in communion. The dancing was lovely to see and gave the church a vibrant atmosphere. It made the people happy whilst they were giving. Being expected to join in was not so lovely. People mostly dance with a kind of marching shuffle and a wiggle in their hips and like bend over to point to the floor or point in different directions. They also hold their arms in an open ring and alternate lifting each arm from the shoulder. At one point the bishop stood at the front to teach the congregation a dance where everyone had to almost sit on the floor they danced so low. We had two offerings. I was getting quite hot so was tempted to try and slip out of the door so I could hide in the long grass outside and sleep in the fresh air. I decided that my white skin would probably get me noticed so I would just have to put up with the heat. There was a man at the end of our pew that owned a camera and wanted everyone to know that. He got up every time a new man came to the lectern and kept a note of the whole service in his exercise book. He pushed past me umpteen times before I decided that I would give him a new seat on my other side and not let him back. Next thing I knew the Bishop started chatting about the whites again and invited Cecil to the front, the German doctor Doctor Hans and his wife and called up Pat. He then asked me up. He asked Pat if she was married and she said she was and he said ahhh what God have bonded no man can put asunder. He asked if I was married yet and I said no, he was very happy and told me I was young and tender and he promised to find me a Nigerian husband! I was quite embarrassed for him to announce it to the whole massive church but I am getting use to being told to marry a Nigerian. I have to finish university and marry a real Nigerian and have a bouncing baby boy. I have to learn to farm and to cook garri. Whenever I make any excuse they tell me that if it happened with other volunteers then it can happen with me too.

When we got home to Amaudo we had a photography session for Reverend Timothy because he is actually a Very Reverend. This means he has been a reverend for 10 years and he is gong to have his induction service on the 18th of May, which means I am going to miss it. Anyway we had to take photographs for his invitation cards and maybe calendars. Martha had taken some he approved but when he printed them he said he did not look very happy or friendly. I agreed that they were bad photographs and we needed to make him laugh. The story that always puts a smile on his face was quite funny so I will tell you it now.

One day there was a bus going along the road and the driver accidentally knocked a man down. In that small part of Nigeria they believe in a life for a life so the crowd that saw the driver who had hit the man, dragged him out of the vehicle and beat him to death. After they had finished killing the driver the man that had been knocked down regained consciousness and stood up. One man shouted “Oh so you wish to live now? …. After we have killed this man for you? No, this cannot happen!” And the men were so cross they had killed the driver for nothing that they killed the man!

Rev Timothy Ogbonnaya

Saturday 5th April - Free time

2008-05-19T15:15:00.001+01:00

Saturday the 5th of April
Saturdays are free time so we went to the email and to the market. Martha is trying to get sponsorship to study in England or the USA so spent a long time on the internet. I felt hungry and sad my own computer had broken so decided to be brave and go to Crunchies on my own and try and buy something to eat. Cecil had told me you can get wraps from a little section outside so I was keen to try one. It was a bit like Magic Roll where I like to eat in Bristol but the choice of filling was very limited to salad, chicken or beef. I took chicken. The boy making my sandwich told me he wanted to marry a white woman and asked for my number, I told him I was too young and about to go to university so he told me to give out numbers of any of my friends in England that were single. I laughed at him. I tired to go inside and buy a doughnut and a drink but the air-conditioning felt so strong I came out in goose bumps and as I was not getting anywhere in the haphazard queuing system I decided to leave.

The tailor had not finished my dress and was at a wedding. I was a bit annoyed.

Friday 4th April - Synod

2008-05-19T15:02:00.005+01:00

Friday the 4th of April
Today I attended a Synod to try and raise funds for Amaudo. The journey again was very long over broken roads and I was feeling fragile. Every bump hurt my neck and I wished we were driving slower. All I can say about synod is that it is a long meeting to discuss every matter of the church over four days ending with a Sunday service. It is run by the Bishop of the Diocese and is held once a year.

My temperature was up and down so many times in the church and I was very glad I had brought my drink of juice with me. We were given booklets to follow and they called out the page we were on every so often. After four hours we got to the part where Rev Timothy was able to speak about Amaudo. He introduced bro Philip who rose his hand and said ‘Praise the Lord!’, when he called my name I too rose and said ‘Praise the lord!’ and raised my hand. It felt very weird and everyone was looking at me a lot. My voice was weak I was wondering if everyone could tell I was feeling a bit out of place.

After speaking about Amaudo the Bishop decided that there would be one Sunday where all the offerings from the 50 something churches in his diocese would all be given to Amaudo. And that people would warn the congregation about when this would be all week so that they give as much as they can and know where it will be spent. This was a good outcome so made it a good trip.

I was then taken into a special house and offered a very good lunch. I decided to take moi moi because Catherine the resident always tells me her favourite food is one moi moi and one okara and that my own is one banana. Moi moi is kind of like sausage without a skin or haggis. It is quite good but I only wanted to take one. They also served us with garri and a different kind of special garri that I forget the name of but cannot myself note any difference.

Garri and soup

Thursday 3rd April - 'Call me.. I love you!'

2008-05-13T17:56:00.001+01:00

Thursday the 3rd of April
Today I was back at Wonderful School. Happiness was in a very playful mood and we had a very positive day. We did ABC and 123 and we sang some new songs. It was not too sunny so we went outside to run around and play in the grass. We took with us small cuddly toys or babies as they call them and threw them around playing catch. We also mended the puncture in the beach ball so Isaac was very happy. I decided to make two children balance my beanie babies lion and chicken on their heads and to run and jump with out loosing them. I chased them round and round the chapel and Happiness joined in. I tired to get some aerobics’ going but it was getting a bit too hot. We cooled down in school and did some singing. I then sang ring-a-ring-of-roses with some girls who still had enough energy. They enjoyed it a lot and thought it was good fun falling over on the grass. I think that next week I would like to have a sports day.

I think I must have taken too much sun because I began to feel very funny. I was not able to eat my garri because the soup tasted too salty. I had trouble keeping my eyes open on the bike on the way home. When I got back I did not even make it into my house, I just sat down on the concrete sofa outside and it felt so cool and comforting to my weak body I went to sleep. I woke up and realised what I had done some hours later and took myself into my house and drank tea and ate food. Martha then came back and I ended up sleeping outside of Rev Timothy’s house until he returned and wondered what I was up to. It felt weird to be running a temperature and I was shivering in my shower. I went to bed early fully wrapped up in long pj bottoms wrapped in my silk sleeping bag and a sheet. I later woke up boiling and had to change and cool off outside. I saw one of the nurses was sitting outside making phone calls so he too was having disturbed sleep. I am not sure why but it made me feel better because he was sharing my pain. I half wanted to go over to him and chat to him but I noticed he was making phone calls. If you are on the MNT network then you can make free night calls from 12 midnight until 5 in the morning. You can also send certain texts for free like ‘call me it’s urgent’ and ‘call me I love you’. Cecil told me this and it made me laugh… he said he kept getting texts saying ‘call me I love you’ and wondering who was sending them and why people were sending him ‘I love you’ texts. I will be a very happy girl if my MNT sim card continues to work in England.

Wednesday 2nd April - Project Comfort

2008-05-13T17:55:00.001+01:00

Wednesday the 2nd of April
Today I went out with Project Comfort again. I was feeling sorry for myself for getting burnt yesterday so I covered up very well with a shirt and scarf. I applied plenty of sun cream and kept reapplying, everyone thought I was a bit strange. So I had to explain sun burn to them so; this skin is red, touch it and it is hot, I feel pain, soon it will fall off, if I use this cream then the sun will not harm my skin and will keep it to be white. I went with Ozuoma to go to parents meeting where they get parents of the children in an area together and have a group meeting. Ozuoma drove like a man, very fast but with complete control. It made me realise how much effort people must have been taking to try and make sure I was not scared on the bikes. We drove to another local government area and it took quite a long time. The forest around us was very beautiful and there was little traffic for most of the ride. We got a flat tire when we came into the village…I can only say we were lucky where it happened! We left the bike in a garage and walked to the meeting. We were 45 minuets late but we were the only people present. The Eze came to welcome us and then the secretary then came to join us and break Kola. He asked me to pray for the Kola but I told him that I had heard that the Kola only spoke in Igbo so I would not be able to pray for the Kola very well! The Eze gave me a box of photographs to look over as entertainment and gave me the gift of an avocado pear. This is a fruit that resembles butter and can be taken with bread or rice. I took it to Rev Timothy and asked him if it was like my own avocado and he said it was not, he had tasted my own and his own was better. When I later came to eat the avocado pear I noticed no difference. The meeting was supposed to start at 10 so we waited till 12 before giving up. It was a shame that no one turned up but with rainy season coming it is a vital time for farming so when people depend on what they grow for what they eat farming can take priority.

I had travelled far on the bike, the longest distance so far so my legs were feeling as though they needed to do some walking. I found Catherine and decided to walk with her. She said she was feeling fine, she had taken her drugs, taken her bath and was pleased I had come back to see her. We sat by her house, the nurses were doing their usual singing and she told me she likes it very much. She even started singing in a very clear and loud voice and got up to clap and dance. I thought this was lovely because she usually uses a soft voice and when I first met her she only would whisper to me. To hear her sing and see her dancing made me feel very happy. I think that music can be very useful motivating people and raising their spirits. Diane told me they use to have dance nights on the weekends. They had one the other day but I did not know it was going on. I think it would be fun to organise a party before I go. I would have to buy ‘mineral’ which is what Nigerians use as a general word for fizzy drinks, kill chickens, put on music and blow up balloons. I will start investigating the costs.

Tuesday 1st April - Fieldwork

2008-05-13T16:44:00.006+01:00

Tuesday the 1st of April
Today was fieldwork. I was going out with Ozuoma and John Jeremiah. We did not have a bike to use so we had to walk or ‘trek’ as they call it. The people that I’m with over here are not use to walking very much. I did not mind trekking as it gave me space to walk about and really enjoy seeing the village in which we were walking. First we visited a young girl who they were teaching home skills to. Since being with Project Comfort she has learned to bath, feed and dress herself well with no help. We were welcomed into the house by taking chalk and then bitter Kola and garden egg (another very bitter tasting plan often used as Kola). It was a traditional mud house with a thatched roof. It was neat and comfortable inside but I did have to bow my head to enter which I found strange because I am only 5”2 so rarely have to bend my head. Today we were teaching sweeping exercises to strengthen her wrists and teach her to sweep the house to help out her family. She is progressing well so that shows that her parents are supporting her and encouraging her to practise and helping her. We can deduce this from the fact she is getting stronger and improving from the last visit. Sometimes the parents forget about the exercise that they are told to repeat with their child which then causes the progress to become very slow.

We then went to visit a small girl who suffered fits when she was young and has restricted movement of her left hand and reduced movement of the left-hand side of her body. We were given groundnut and bitter Kola as we entered the house and were given floral smelling talc to put on our skin because of the heat which was causing us to sweat quite a bit so I enjoyed the talc. I have two very nice talcs at home I bought in Lush one is ginger and the other is sweet orange & patuili. I am quite annoyed at myself for not bringing them now I realise how freshening talc can be! Ozuoma looked at her hand and did stretches with the girl to make her recover better use of her left side of her body. The girl is doing fine and was glad for us to visit. She got dressed-up making a special effort when she found we had arrived in her house.

We then met a boy who was having trouble writing clearly in school. His mother and grandmother were there and a lot of children gathered outside the porch where we were working to see the white person. The mother and grandmother had not been practising the techniques used to improve writing so Ozuoma wanted to get though to them and try to get them to help the boy.

Uzuoma and Project Comfort child

Next we saw a girl who had a disability that means her hips are not correct and she has trouble walking. She was a bright and co-operative child. I found her situation quite hard because her disability looked so painful. She said it does hurt her but she is moving about fine and enjoying making friends with all the other children in her village. (in the picture she is wearing the black dress)

Lastly we saw a small child. The child was very young and its legs were very thin and weak looking. At first I thought the child’s problem was that its legs were too thin but then I realised there were several big wounds on the child. They have put her on antibiotics but when one wound goes another will come. Project Comforts only choice is to take the girl to the hospital and do tests on her blood and the wounds.

I enjoyed today very much it was good to see the villages and to walk through the forests and see where people lived. We were welcomed into every home with talc and/ or Kola, which is very giving when they have so little money.

It was very sunny today which is the first time I have really taken sun. It came as a surprise to me because usually it is very cloudy but warm. I got caught out and got a little sun burnt. Everyone found it very interesting what my skin did and felt great concern. Before I came to dining I covered myself with sun cream because my skin was feeling sore and dry and everyone was saying wow you are so shiny you are sweating so much! Why are you red? Why are you oily? Chi (chi is said when they hear something that is sad, it means sorry) When I told them what had happened I got a lot of ‘chi’ and ‘sorry-o’

Monday 31st March - Project Comfort

2008-05-13T14:52:00.001+01:00

Monday the 31st of March
Today I went to Project Comfort. It gave me a taste of Nigerian disorganisation and time keeping. We went to see a nurse in her own office but she said she was at our own. When we got to our own she said she was at her own. Now being told all that when you thought you were going to a place called Hoffers not Hoffier is all a bit confusing. Hoffers is a fast food joint with air conditioning, television and is a good place to eat. As it was lunchtime I thought our visit to Hoffers must have been a treat organised to welcome to me Project Comfort not a wild goose chase for a woman who did not seem to want to be found. I was expecting a meeting about the children we would be meeting in the week and to discuss their progress. Instead I had come on the day of the tri-monthly staff meeting so nothing talked about made a whole lot of relevance to any children in detail.

Despite the confusion, it was good to meet the team. There is Rev David who is the co-ordinator, Ozuoma who I see as taking the role of ‘top dog’. She has been with the project for a long time and is very smart. She organises the boys who are Evan, Obinna and the newest member John Jeremiah who was the barber at the Workshop in Amaudo 1 that showed me around. It was very hot in the office and I felt quite tired. John saw I was looking bad and bought me some biscuits to eat. He is a good friend but I felt a little embarrassed to be the only one to eat something when it was so hot so I went and fetched 8 pure waters so everyone could have a drink. Pure water is good drinking water that is sold in plastic bags, you bite open a corner to drink. It looks like how goldfish were packaged when you win them at fairs and you can often find children walking about with big baskets of them on their heads. Pure water used to be 5N a bag but has now gone up to 10N so from about one penny to two point five pennies! You can buy 10 pure waters for about 40 pence. A bottle of cold coke in glass costs 50N so about 20 pence….this makes me feel bad about working in a restaurant where I sell a smaller bottle of coke for £2.90 and we do not even reuse the glass!

Some nurses have come to stay at Amaudo as part of their training. There are 40 in total so it is taking over quite a lot. The ones by my house are all males and enjoy singing. Luckily for me they sing very well in a barbershop style that I have been secretly enjoying from behind closed doors.

Sunday 30th March - Eze

2008-05-13T14:36:00.001+01:00

Sunday the 30th of March
The weather has been too hot. I have felt pretty crap. I did not sleep in as long as I had enjoyed last Sunday. To tell the truth it is the worst night’s sleep I have had since coming to Amaudo. I had many weird dreams. When I first came I was dreaming of England and waking up confused to be in Nigeria. Last night I dreamed I was on an army training camp with Catherine and some other residents sleeping in a small house sharing bunk beds and spending all day doing assault courses. I think this must mean I have fully accepted Amaudo into my heart as my home even at a subconscious level.

Diane told me about the Eze of the village of Okopedi in which Amaudo has made its home. An Eze is like a local King, they sort out problems with in the village and people go to them for advice. This Eze is the one that allowed Ros to get the land. There is a lot of stigmatism and fear of mental health here in Nigeria so it took a lot of time and trust in the Eze for the villagers to give the land over and allow the building of such an institution so close to their homes. Unfortunately the Eze had a dispute with the government about boarders and land. The government took his salary away as a punishment and now he has lost his official status and he has lost the respect of his community.

Diane and Ros valued Eze even after he lost his title. So we decided to go and make a visit to him. It was the first time for me to break Kola and do it properly. I have eaten Kola nut before so I know I do not enjoy it. We first prayed for the Kola and then took chalk. The women put the chalk on their necks to represent surviving the war that is childbirth. Childbirth is likened to a war because it is a hard struggle and it claims the lives of many women. Once a woman gives birth she marks her neck with chalk to show her neck has been saved. Men put the chalk on their wrists but I have not been able to get much of an answer to the significance of this. Only that for both men and women when you see the chalk marking their skin it identifies them as a friend of someone in the village. If there is no chalk marked on a stranger then they will be seen as an enemy and driven away. The white chalk does not show up on my white skin! We then took Kola and bush meat that included liver, kidney, and chunks of skin and delightful things. I did not fancy eating it so I only ate one piece of kidney to show everyone I was accepting the food and gave the rest to Martha in secret so as not to offend him and we drank Guinness with lemonade. Methodist Reverends are not allowed to drink here so Rev Timothy and Rev Peter left their Guinness but I enjoyed mine. Drinking here is not considered to be Christian and women especially are not supposed to drink.

29 March 2008 - Homesick

2008-04-17T14:34:00.000+01:00

Saturday the 29th of March
Today was set aside for visiting the War Museum; we went to collect emails first. I was not really in the mood for going out. I did not sleep so well last night because I was missing home. I was not really missing any of the people (sorry all!) but more things that I like to have when I am feeling low.
1. Tea & biscuits with GOOD milk
2. A cold glass of milk
3. Chips
4. A cold Old Rosy (with Indigo & whoever else is about, on the apple possibly with a slice of brie cheese, chutney and bread)
5. My saggy sofa that lets me lie with my head and feet raised when I am watching TV
6. Good old processed meat like hamburgers, chicken burgers and spaghetti bollanyse & lasagna
7. Music (I am cursing that EPC for wiping my Ipod so much now the honeymoon period of loving Nigeria is fading)
8. Eating vegetables and fruit with every meal
9. Being able to feel the cold and sleeping under two duvets
10. Safe roads and organised traffic where a car has the correct amount of people in. Road markings. Traffic lights. Zebra crossings. Speed limits.

Things I have taken too well:
1. The shower room. It is very large and cool. Showering is quiet and refreshing. I put detol in the water like everyone else. Detol’s market is staggering over here! There are loads of adverts on TV and all around the place. They market their cleaner to be used in your bath water, clean the house with and disinfect things. They also have Detol soap so you can be extra safe when washing.
2. Garri, when the soup is sweet and not very salty I am learning to enjoy it. Rev Timothy’s wife makes it very well. I can even finish the whole meal.
3. Nigerians don’t have the same marketing problems where every problem needs a different product. Why would I buy fairy washing up liquid if the powder I have bought to wash my clothes in works just as fine!
4. Okada bikes. I enjoy them because they are better at avoiding bumps in the road and can go round potholes. You do not get squashed unless you are riding with more than two people on the bike. The breeze is refreshing and it cools you down before you get to where you wish to be

Some Nigerian phrases
- Onyeocha/ Sister – a greeting for white people, ‘sister’ is used by people that know Ros Colwill and by the children of those who knew her
- I am Coming - when walking away from you so that they are quite clearly going but will be returning later on
- Snapping - Photographing and anything to do with cameras
- What of my own? This my own? – This talks about something that is for you or is belonging to you. “Your orange is green…my own is orange in colour and is sweeter….I miss my own”
- Food is Ready - Fast food, not the way we think of fast food, so no chips and burgers it is just food that is cooked with speed
- Ease myself - Go to the toilet
- Picking - this word is used for getting anything. Be it picking food from the market, stealing something, or taking a homeless person from the street to carry back to Amaudo
- Fine - here fine means better than very good and better than fair. Fine is the highest marking of something so excuse me if I call something fine when it is actually very good and liked a lot

The war meausium was closed so we went to Adukuwe bunker instead. It was an underground hide out for Adukuwe where he lived in the war. It was very cold inside and I was embarrassed to think that it was a fine place to live although I half wished I could spend the night there. We were taken about on a tour with some navy men who were dressed up very smart. I wanted to ‘snap’ them and their security guards that were in helmets and had guns. To leave we had to exit via a ladder that was made of rungs up a tunnel. I was a bit annoyed to be having to wear skirts the whole time but Rev Timothy felt a lot worse because he is afraid of heights. This made up my mind about us leaving via the ladder. He asked me how could he could climb and carry his bag in his hand? I said to him if you can drive me safely whilst eating and drinking then you should be able to climb and carry. I gave him my shopper bag so he could hold all his things about his neck. It was the first time I have been better than him/ Martha at anything before so I felt pretty happy. He was such a drama queen when he got out the top.

I told Martha I wished to photograph the navy men because they look so smart but was worried they would think I was silly. I then realised that several of them were taking photographs of me. So I said “I am admiring your bright white uniforms and you are admiring my bright white skin why don’t we all stand together and it will make a fine photograph.” Then everyone was happy.

The navy men

Later we went to the market to collect my clothing I had measured. I was very excited to pick up a lovely green dress with a matching skirt and shirt. They were rather tight but the tailor assured me that they would grow with wear. Rev Timothy’s birthday had been on Thursday and none had done anything so I wanted to find him a birthday present because he has been so good at caring for my needs.

The taylor

Diane had a stream of visitors all day long. She is loved so much and had been given lots of gifts like mango, oranges and bread.

28 March 2008 - The burial of Deaconess Oyiri

2008-04-17T14:20:00.000+01:00

Friday the 28th of March
Today was the burial of Deaconess Oyiri. Burials here are a very big occasion and everyone who has had their lives touched by the person all make long journeys to come to the funeral. There was a service first here at Amaudo because of her long term involvement and love of Amaudo. The coffin was two hours late and arrived in an ambulance with flashing lights. The Chapel of Peace was packed full with three people on each bench instead of the usual two. Rev Timothy’s wife came and she brought their daughter Marvellous so it was the first time I met his family.

It took about four cars and a bus to transport everyone to the funeral. Nigerians are not as worried about road safety as we are in the UK, so pack people into cars so close you do not need to wear a seatbelt. I wanted to sit in the back of the pick-up truck so I could enjoy the breeze and not be squashed but they insisted on me entering the front cab in case I fell out or came to any harm. I thought this was a bit unfair because I now ended up squashed in the back of the cab with two good adult sized men and Martha. The journey was much further than I could manage and I felt very hot and a bit travel sick. We came to a road where Very Rev Timothy said if we did not close our glass (windows) we would be eating dust like food. Being subjected to a feast of sand and dust was a good description as the cloud engulfed our car for a good few moment reducing visibility to almost zero. I was slightly concerned by Rev Timothy’s cowboy driving and was very glad to reach the church. The Church was massive with rows and rows of benches outside with tents up to shield those who sat there because they could not enter the church. At burials everyone who belongs to one group will all make clothes from the same cloth to identify themselves as a group. The service was several hours long and almost totally conducted in Igbo. The booklet printed for the service was all written in Igbo so I probably should not have been surprised. The temperature was very hot and half way through the service the weather broke and we had a fabulous thunderstorm with lots of thunder and pelting rain. I felt relived because rain cools the temperature down. Having a camera is very rare so if you own one you are automatically given the right to get up whenever you want and go where ever you wish to take a photograph. It felt a bit weird being asked to go and ‘snap’ (photograph) the service and I kept being worried that people might mind.

We had an offering for the family. I don’t know if I have written it yet but when you have an offering in church everyone stands up and waits their turn to dance to the front in a long queue and dance all over the church before returning to their place to dance some more. Although I think it is nice that everyone dances all around the church I find it a bit daunting and try to make my circuit very fast. Being white there is no way to hide because there was only two other white people in the church, Sister Ros Colwill who gave life to her vision of Amaudo and Sister Diane who had been the welfare officer of Amaudo for five years. I got some photos of the coffin being lowered into the ground.

The coffin being lowered

Everyone gathered outside after the coffin was in the ground and we all ate lunch and then departed. On the way back a careless driver pulled out onto the main road without checking for oncoming traffic and despite braking hard and swerving we crashed the car. The man was aggressive and did not want to accept it was his fault. I took a photograph of his number-plate, face, and damage to his car and damage to our own. He ran away before Rev Timothy could reach him. We went to the police station and showed them the photos. They said they would arrest the man but asked for a bribe. We then went to pick up Diane because she is staying in Amaudo for a few days. Diane has a very English soothing voice and has a warm glow to her, it may be because she is pregnant, but I am enjoying her company a lot. Its funny how someone putting on the kettle to make tea after a long day can make you think of home. She told me stories about Amaudo some were new and others were old but had a different take on them because they were not being told by a Nigerian.

27 March 2008 - The School for Wonderful Children

2008-04-17T12:33:00.000+01:00

Thursday the 27th of March
Today I went to the 'Wonderful School' again. It was quite a hot day. The pupils were happy to see me because they knew I would have balloons. This balloon giving has been becoming a bit tiring because everyone wants their own and they pop them too fast. I wanted to get to school so I could play with the wonderful children. There is one woman who likes me so much she runs to hug me. She has a lazy eye like I had when I was 4 and had to go for an operation so we have something in common. When she is in church she likes to dance a lot, which brings other people to dance and gives it a colourful atmosphere. There is another very outgoing women who has a small beard. She is very good at taking care of the smaller children and will carry them around and play with them.

At the school

I decided that today was washing day and all the toys needed to have a bath. The toys in the school are quite old and have been donated from people. Almost all of the jigsaws are from the Early Learning Centre (ELC) where I had been working in the lead up to Christmas to get money for my trip. I bathed the walker and the pull along telephone. It made me wish I had brought another suitcase of donations just to equip the school because they appreciate and love these toys so much even when they are getting ugly and broken.

Amaudo 2 Residents

In my drinking flask today I had juice. I made the mistake of drinking in the classroom. When I left, the Reverend’s children, who are very sharp, came to find me to share the juice. I was a bit surprised but children here are not use to drinking anything other than water. Even lots of adults are interested in my juice and like to come to my house to have a cup. When I say juice its not even good fruit juice it is only squash.

The cook was not around so Happiness had to cook lunch on her own. I offered to help her and the pupils though it was very funny that the white woman thought she could help their teacher to cook garry. Garri is quite a funny thing to eat. You mix up cassava (a root vegetable) with hot water until it makes dough not dissimilar to play dough. You then mould the dough in your right hand and use it to eat bitter soup made from leaves, fish, pepper, sometimes melon and something yellowish, which may be the palm oil.

Back at Amaudo 1 I have been tidying up and sweeping a lot because I know Diane (the previous Welfare Officer of Amaudo) is coming to stay in the guest house with me and I am worried she wont enjoy sharing a house with such a messy person. I have swept it twice and my friend Rose, the daughter of one of the cooks, also came to sweep and fetch water to help make her feel at home.

Catherine was not at dining tonight so I was worried she was sick or had left. She is not one to miss meals and always tries to push to the front because she does not like standing in line. Martha and I went to look for her and found her sleeping in her bed. We woke her up and got her to go to the kitchen were the kind cook had saved her some dinner. I like the cooks they are funny people and always joke about my meal sizes and how I am getting on with their Nigerian meals.

By the evening Catherine had already changed her clothing the right way round and was sleeping well. This is good because it means her drugs are taking effect and she will soon start getting better.

26 March 2008 - The Residents

2008-04-17T11:59:00.000+01:00

Wednesday the 26th of March
Evelyn sang through the night. I was woken up at 5 by her singing, I am worried she is disturbing her house mates if Martha and I can hear her from our own rooms! I asked how they were finding their new friend (the resident that we ‘picked’) and they all agreed that they like her. I suppose it is nice to have some music in Amaudo because it is a very rural and quiet area.

I am getting to know the residents in the house next door to me quite well. Catherine and Innocent often end up eating my leftovers. They are becoming like my children - they both seem to take it in turns to sit/sleep outside my house and wait for me. It’s quite sweet.

Today I went to ‘Repatriation’ (a meeting) to discuss the problems faced by discharged resident living at home. It seems that the root of the problems are coming from the fact people are not educated about mental illness in the same way as people understand it at home in the UK. When families are paying for drugs they expect instant recovery and for their relative to be as strong and able as any other person. Unfortunately the drugs used are often cheap ones which have some side effects such as to make the mentally ill person sleep all the time and make them feel hunger all the time; the drugs can also cause tremors. In some cases families decide to give up the treatment and send their relative away to a prayer house. This is a cheaper way of ‘helping’ their family member because there is a one off fee to take them away and they are going to be with people of the church who will drive the evil out of them. Prayer houses chain and beat mentally ill people and they try and starve evil spirits from them. Nothing constructive happens in prayer houses, in fact quite a lot of residents we picked up from the streets to bring to Amaudo had escaped from the prayer houses.

In the afternoon I went to Ward Round again. Now I have been her for a while I was able to know which resident they were talking about. Sunday is a boy who likes to sniff things. He tried to enter my house to find bread the other day, I asked him to leave and later found him sniffing my washing. Behold is the middle-aged man who believes he is a soldier from the civil war. He likes to march and salutes people he likes/ respects by flapping his arms up one after the other. The doctor is worried about his delusions about being a soldier and insisting he is 21. It shows he has very little insight into real life but he is a nice man and very sociable to a younger resident called Chinyere. They always walk around the compound in step enjoying each other’s company and they always eat in dining together and sit close at chapel. I hope his increased medication does not make him too tired to enjoy Chinyere. Catherine my ‘daughter’ was also in the group. I was glad to be able to discuss her case and raise some concerns, Catherine is an ex-resident who has been home and was doing very well, unfortunately for whatever reason she disappeared and was found back on the streets again.

Concerns about Catherine:
- She is restless and always walk around the compound all day and all night
- She is stubborn and refuses to take her bath and wash her clothes
- She always likes to wear her clothes back to front and inside out and gets changed into a different outfit more than an English man drinks tea
- She has hurt her foot and the wound is looking sore & starting to swell
- She has a large stomach which is possibly a fibroid so is being put forward for an ultrasound when she is feeling more stable
- She knows I like her too much to be cross at her so has started snatching from me even if I have given her some for herself e.g. Slices of bread or drinks of juice
- I found her naked outside my house this morning scratching all over her body quite distressed

Nurse said she has seen to wound and will make sure it is dressed twice a day, the only problem is Catherine walks so much the bandage comes off and because she does not like to wear her flip flops sand can get in the wound. Martha too has been bathing the cut. As for the itching they feel it is probably a case of bed bugs so they will go to the market and get some insect killer and treat her bed. I feel if it is bed bugs this may be why she does not like to sleep in her house so this will help the problem of restlessness. It is also quite hot at the moment so I have been lying down on the concrete benches outside. I feel much happier about Catherine now I know all her problems are being taken care of.

The doctor came to see me in the early evening. He called me ‘Onyeocha’ and told me I had too many bites all over my arms and face and small facial wounds. He wanted to know if I was taking care of them. I told him that the bites were freckles made from the same melanin his own skin is coloured with and that the wounds were not paining me because they are only spots. My face is red because this country is uncomfortably hot and that I found him to be a very rude man.

The doctor came to dining in his boxer shorts. It made me laugh.

25 March 2008 - 'Picking'

2008-04-17T11:38:00.000+01:00

Tuesday the 25th of March
Today Martha and I were up very early to prepare for going out to pick up some new Residents from the streets. Steve the House Parent and the Amaudo driver, James, were arranged to take us. Steve is very experienced and has been with Amaudo from the beginning. According to Steve it is best to ‘pick’ Residents up in the early morning hours as they tend to be calmer and easier to talk to.

It took us a while before we could find anyone to approach. We saw several people that Amaudo has tired to help on more than three separate occasions but they were determined to return to live on the street.

How ‘picking’ works is that first you have to interview the homeless person to asses if they are mentally ill. Then if they are mentally ill you have to try and persuade them into the vehicle. Once inside they are usually happy. Then the Resident is brought to Amaudo and offered a shower, given new clothing, a new hair cut (often their heads are shaved due to common head-lice) and shown to their new home.

Then they are fed and introduced to every day life at Amaudo. There are no fences surrounding the centre so residents are free to leave if they wish. If a Resident leaves and is found on the street again the staff often bring them back to Amaudo two or three times before eventually leaving them on the street. This hardly ever happens and there are plenty of stories of Residents leaving for a short while but bringing themselves back here because they know they will be fed well and cared for. There was even one woman who ran away to her home but returned to Amaudo because the food was better and more plentiful!

Anyway we spotted a man sitting in the middle of the road with some sacks. He was smiling and waving at the vehicle so we went to interview him. He said his job was collecting scrap to sell and showed us the items in his bag. His speech was good and clear and he seemed to know what he was doing. The only odd thing he said was that he was not wearing his sandals because they were too heavy so he preferred to carry them in his hands. We decided he was doing fine and was not yet in need of Amaudo’s support.

Steve with the man we decdied was not in need of Amaudo's support

Next we spotted a very dirty man wearing an old hat with a pony tail attached to the side of it. He was carrying a bag and walking through the traffic. I was pretty excited because he definitely looked mentally ill, we even tired reversing round a round-a-bout. (the traffic here in Nigeria is pretty crazy, I have only driven on two marked roads since moving away form the airport. I can’t recall seeing any traffic lights and there does not seem to be any speed limits!) Luckily we were able to find him again crossing a car park towards some shops. Steve went to go chat to him and found him to be mentally unstable. A crowd was building to see what we were bothering ourselves with the ‘mad man’ for. When they saw we wanted to take him with us they were laughing so much. I filmed the scene so I hope I can get up on this blog soon.

Steve talking to the man who we ‘picked’ and took to Amaudo

He was very disorientated and resisted entering. However as soon as he sat down he was still and quiet and settled instantly so we decided that we did not need to return to the centre immediately and could go and look for anyone else who might need the support of Amaudo.

Next we found a woman singing and chatting to herself. Steve spoke to her in Igbo and she found him to be very funny and got in the car laughing. She chattered and sang all the way home, making jokes to herself and laughing lots. I got a lovely picture of them both in the car. I was surprised how well mannered they were. We stopped a few times and did not lock the doors so I knew they were happy to be coming with us.

The new residents in the car

Once at the centre the new residents had a sit down before having their hair cut and being sorted out. The women we had picked seemed to really enjoy getting a haircut for free and Steve even let me do a bit of the barbering.

Me giving the new resident a hair cut

After the hair cuts we sorted through their belongings. The man had lots and lots of ‘junk’ on him like lots of bits of metal and had on some strange jewellery. In his hand bag was the burnt-out part of a photo copier machine. His total money was 10 Naira. If one sterling pound gets you 235 Naira then you can see it is not a lot.

The woman had a sack containing lots of clothing, food and quite a lot of money stashed away in little bags and tied into the clothes. The money was taken from them and put into the safe to be returned to them at their discharge ceremony.

This is a photo of our new resident now she is refreshed and cleaned up

22 to 24 March 2008 - Easter Weekend

2008-04-07T13:27:00.000+01:00

Saturday the 22nd of March
Today I went in to town to do emails. Reverend Kenneth drove us to Bende from where we got the bus. The buses are mini van size with benches going all across the van. They pack people in full to bursting so unloading the bus looks like some kind of circus feat. It’s very squashed and I felt quite unconvertible and hot. There are not any bus stop signs so you can flag buses down on the route, I do not really understand how you could tell which bus would go where but everyone else seems to get it.

When we had finished emails we went shopping in the market for food and wrappers so I could get some dresses made up by a tailor. I chose some fine cloth so am expecting very beautiful dresses that I can wear back home in summer, I also have got a skirt and shirt coming, It’s going to take 2 weeks to finish my order but I am pretty excited.

Sunday the 23rd of March, Easter Sunday
Today was Easter. To celebrate our friends from Amaudo 2 all came down on two trucks so we could have a joint service. All our Residents were tailored brand new clothes so everyone was dressed up very smartly and brightly. Everyone was in a good mood and it was a very joyful service. When we ate lunch everyone was given fizzy drinks.

Outside Amaudo's Chapel of Peace

Rose, her brother and her cousin came to my house after lunch to do drawing. It was a very hot day so we had been expecting rain. We had quite a storm so our power was cut of early in the evening but it cooled the temperature down to comfortably cool.

Monday the 24th of March, Easter Monday
I have not done a lot today, as it is a public holiday. I have mainly done typing and had another mini art class. Resident Adaze and Bro Philip’s daughter came today. I was especially pleased with Adaze because she concentrated so well and took a lot of care over her drawing of my toy chicken. Reverend Kenneth told me they are going out to pick Residents tomorrow and I am invited to come, I am pretty excited I hope we find some and that they are good tempered.

Mini art class

14 to 21 March 2008 - My first week at Amaudo

2008-04-07T12:01:00.000+01:00

Friday the 14th of March
Today we went to get my bags from the airport. Cecil wanted to bring Christian from the local village because he said he had never seen an airport. He has finished his schooling for now and has to wait for money to restart; he also has to wait for his older brother to finish first. We dropped into the CPP office (Community Psychiatric Program) and called the airport. They said my bags were now in Lagos and would come the next day.

We then decided to stop for lunch at Bubbles the Nigerian equivalent of a fast food restaurant. Martha then met us and took me to the market to buy some cloths. The market was pretty busy and I got quite a lot of attention for being white. Lots of stall owners called “Onyeocha” to me which is a greeting meaning white person they also shouted 'white' and 'USA'. I bought a nice shirt for 700N which is about £3 and some bananas for under £1.

In the evening Martha and I go to Reverend Timothy's house for company, he has a fan and a television so we chat and watch films. He has stacks and stacks so I am looking forward to getting through some of those! We can also cook some dinner like plantain and yam.

Saturday the 15th of March
I slept better last night and was up at half 6 to be ready for church at 7. The service is half an hour and then there is breakfast. In church, men and women sit on separate sides and the residents sit amongst the staff. I was welcomed officially and introduced to everyone by his or her name and job title.

Today we picked up Christian again and drove out to the airport. We were told to be there for half 11 but we got there for 12. They said the aeroplane was still in Lagos and they would not be able to tell us if my bags were on board until the plane arrived. We were allowed to sit in the VIP lounge for free to make up for the fact we had over an hour to wait. The lounge had comfy chairs and fans going and a television against the wall. A woman brought a book over for us to sign saying Name, Date, Business, Amount. Everyone else who had been in the lounge had to pay 1,000N for the privilege. This is only about £5 but is quite a lot of money; you could buy a small radio for 600N and then get lunch out for 400N!

We went and watched the plane landing and my luggage was there. I was pretty happy and spread it all around my house making it messy and homely.

Sunday 16th of March, Palm Sunday
Church is at 10 on the weekend so I got a nice lie in till half nine. Today was Palm Sunday so some people had picked palm leaves to bring to church. When hymns are sung there is a choice to sing in either Igbo or English, this happens at the same time so it took me a while to understand what was going on. People eat quite heavily here. For breakfast beans or rice is served, lunch is always garri and for dinner we eat rice with stew. Sunday meals are the other way round having garri for lunch and rice with stew for supper. Garri is white starchy sticky dough made from grounded cassava, which is fried; this is served with leafy vegetable soup with fish in. Rice with stew is pretty self-explanatory. The stew is quite spicy and the rice is boiled.

I haven't done a lot today just washing and organising. I walked around the Amaudo grounds. Martha, Rose and I went on a walk to see the sun set.

Monday the 17th of March
Today I got up earlier at 6 so I could shower before church. I had a meeting with Reverend Kenneth to talk about what I should do this week. He gave me Group 3 of the Residents to observe and get to know so I would be able to know what was going on in the clinical review, work shop review and WARD round on Wednesday. My residents are
1) Peter
2) Mary
3) Ngosi
4) Chibuzo
5) Friday
6) Goodwill
7) Innocent
8) Grace
I have also been asked to look out for:

Evelyn : to see if I can get her address for a home visit

Nathen: who was a teacher before he got sick and is now settling into shoe making before he can be discharged.

And I will be interested to meet the newest Resident who is suffering from delusions of Grandeur and believes she is Queen Elizabeth. She has a fancy scarf and has been keeping herself well enough to be allowed to keep her hair on entering Amaudo.

After the meeting I went to work shop from 10 till lunchtime (1 o clock). Workshop is where residents come to learn trade skills so they can support themselves once they are discharged and living back at home. There are currently 8 sections; Jewelry making, shoe making, carpentry, tailoring, barbering and hairdressing, a trading section and a typing table. There is a game table for those who do not feel up for working that day. There is also talk of bring back more traditional crafts such as basket and broom making. Residents also help work on the farm, planting and caring for crops; this too will help with rehabilitation.

The residents were happy to be in workshop and enjoyed the attention of me photographing them or snapping as they call it. While I was there a member of CPP came in to get her shoe fixed. Emmanuel loves mending shoes and I think he is doing well.

Residents in the Workshop

When a Resident comes to discharge they have a celebration service and invite people from the local and state government, board members, families and the local area. In the service the Resident is given the equipment needed to set up their trade they were taught at Amaudo. This means a tailor gets a sowing machine, hairdressers have all the little bits and a hair dryer and a trader will be set up with biscuits and drinks to start shop and so on.

Tuesday 18th of March
Today I was up at half 5 so I could follow House Parent Favor around on her morning routine. We had to wake up the Residents in her block at 6am and make them fetch water for their baths. Each House Parent is given a group of Residents all of the same sex and the House Parent themselves should be the same sex as the Residents they care for. It is the job of a House Parent to provide everything their Residents needs so help getting up in the morning, clothing, toiletries and special attention for if they are troubled or hurt. They are expected to get to know their Residents and do everything a parent would do for their own child. There are some Residents that need supervision to make sure they do take their baths because when they are not stable they do not bothered about keeping clean. Once everyone is up and dressed Favor gives out the drugs required by their psychosis and mental problems. Church is at 7 and breakfast is at half past.

Later I sat in on the clinical review. The same questions are asked to each Resident from the group
How are you?
Are you happy?
Do you eat well?
Do you sleep well?
When you are alone do you sometimes hear voices but cannot see anyone?
Are you a special somebody?
Is anyone against you?
What would you do if the room were on fire?
What is this place?
What do they do here?
Why are you here?
Do you take drugs?
What are they for?

These questions are used to assess:

Mood
Hallucinations
Delusions
Insight
Thought

From the interview process they also build up an information bank about the persons past; where they are from, family relations, what their occupation was before going to the street, how long they have been on the street...etc.

They also monitor the blood pressure and weight of the Resident. Once all the information is together they can then propose a plan of how to help the Resident improve up to the point of discharge.

Most of the Residents gave pretty normal answers, a lot can recognize they are in Amaudo a center that cares for and rehabilitates people with mental illness but do not think they themselves are mentally sick.

Papa Issacc is at times under the delusion he is God. Today he said that Jesus made man but he himself made everything in the world like clothing, paper and drugs. He said he was taking drugs for the sake of others that are sick like the nurse and when he takes them they will transfer to help those who need the drugs.

In WorkShop review they monitor how they are getting on at learning their trade. How motivated and skilled they are. They also make note of how well a Resident is keeping themselves if they have body odor and how they keep their clothes. An example of a Resident who does not keep her clothes well is Catherine, she almost always wears things undone and inside out, and sometimes back to front as well. She also likes to put on clothes upon clothes and can change her outfit every 20 minuets at times. She is not very settled and likes to walk around a lot. I am quite found of her and she can be a very funny woman.

WARD ROUND is where everyone meets up to discuss their observations of the Residents in that group for the week and talks about their problems and if they have got over any. At a typical WARD ROUND there will be a Doctor, the Nurse, WorkShop and the Chaplain present. However as it is Holy Week I only heard from the Nurse and WorkShop. Success is a psychology graduate here for his year of service, here in Nigeria every graduate has to serve a year of voluntary work before they can get a job, it is called being a youth corpa. They are sent far away from the state they grew up in so that they can experience a different culture to their own and learn that the South is no better than the North or whatever else people that have not traveled may think. Success gives his psychological opinions of what is going on with the person’s behavior and helps the Chaplain and Nurse to improve interview technique to coax more information from the Resident if they are closing up.

I also found my dominos today, I wish I had brought them to WorkShop. I tried the game out with cook and House Parent KC and it proved very popular which amused me a little because they are quite grown up men. I think I will use playing games as a way of getting to know Residents.

Thursday 20th March, Maundy Thursday
Today I went to Ntalakwu to visit Amaudo 2 and the Wonderful School. The Wonderful School is for mentally and psychically disabled children.

Today was also my first Okada ride. Okadas are small motor bikes and are the most common form of public transport, I was a bit scared as the bikes to me did not look too safe, sometimes you see three people on a bike at the same time and nobody wears any safety gear, but Reverend Timothy booked me his best driver and told him to carry me like an egg. It was actually quite fun because it is breezy and not so bumpy because you are freer to avoid potholes and bumps in the roads.

I got a very warm welcome and all the children rushed out to see me. When I say children I mean the pupils of the school, several could be in their 20s and there was another woman called Catherine who looks very old.

Nicolas the farmer took me around the Amaudo 2 center and showed me where they have their bakery and poultry farm, Both are now closed due to insufficient funding but are ready to start up again as soon as the money comes in.

Happiness

The teacher for the Wonderful School is called Happiness. She is young, pretty and very happy and caring for her children. The school is small and only contains one class, today there were 10 children and they settled to jigsaws well. The first thing I noticed about being there was how happy they all were, everyone was smiling at me and even though I could not understand what they were saying (they only speak Igbo and not very well) I enjoyed their company and their laughter. There were two children on the floor who were too disabled to join in jigsaw making, I decided to give them some balloons to play with that ended up with a big game of beach ball with all the students. I got lots of lovely photos and they were very keen to be snapped. They liked the camera and found it exciting I could show them photos of what they look like and videos of things I had seen. We sang songs of praise and broke up for relaxing time and then lunch. In the communal hall where lunch is eaten I got another game going with balloons. They are pretty into balloons and love blowing them up.

After Wonderful School I was picked up and taken to Helping Hands School for the ceremony of the handing over of the new school bus. The Ceremony was a big affair, 6-8 Rotary club members came to it including the president and the past president. The bus was presented to Helping Hands School at the school. The local Governor and the Commissioner for Education attended and the commissioner gave an address. There was a welcome service, singing from the school children and the Rotary Club sang their Rotary song. The bus was blessed and the school was presented with a donation of books and pens from the Rotary club and they also presented the Commissioner and the headmistress with a plaque. Everyone went outside to be photographed with the bus with the important people at the back and the kids in the front, I was asked to be in the photograph too which was nice. The children then danced and gave a traditional drum display. The whole Ceremony was filmed for the news. I hope to see it on television soon.

Everyone snapped with the bus

Traditional dance by children, during the presentation of the bus

At our evening service for Maundy Thursday we had feet washing to Reverend Kenneth washed staff’s feet and they in turn washed the Residents feet.

Friday 21st March, Good Friday
Today, because it was Good Friday staff and Residents from Amaudo 1 were invited to join in the service at Amaudo 2. Everyone packed into the truck but Success took Martha and I on the bike together. It was a lovely service and was nice having small children around, Very Reverend Bernard has two sons and a daughter and Reverend David has four sons.

Catherine was walking around with a teddy bear today. She was enjoying playing with it but it looked quite sad and broken so I decided to mend it for her by sewing up his leg and body and giving him new stuffing. I enjoyed mending it because I knew she appreciated it. Later she asked if I could be her mother. I said I am too young please may I be your auntie

Fixing teddy!

Success, Martha and I went out in the afternoon to find some Residents on my list to teach Dominos to. We decided to find Grace and Ngosi because they are quite lively and in the afternoon is when most Residents enjoy a nap. Grace has made good friends with Behold so he joined our game too. They picked it up pretty quick, faster than House Parent KC who kept confusing it with Ludo, Whilst playing we asked them questions like how are they and where did they come from? They joked quite a bit.... Behold does persistently claim to be a soldier although judging on his floppy salute and his claim to be involved in the civil war that most likely happened before he was born we think it is a delusion.

Dominos

13 March 2008 - Getting to Amaudo

2008-04-07T11:38:00.000+01:00

Thursday 13th of March
I have been pretty busy settling in. The journey was pretty hectic. My flight from Heathrow to Lagos was overbooked and they were trying to make people fly another day. I don't think they were successful so to balance the weight they left 150 out of 250 cases in London. We were not told until 20 minuets before arrival and they could not tell us which bags were left or whom they belonged to. Getting of the plane I was expecting the 'wall of heat' I had been warned of, instead it was more like entering the reptile house at the zoo; warm and damp so its harder to breath. I was still wearing my two jumpers so began feeling a bit funny but did not want to loose the rest of the passengers. I was sick at passport control, which was a bit embarrassing, but it meant I was taken to the medical room. There I got to sleep with a fan in a cool room and got a free cup of tea and had someone to fetch my bags, so really it was a blessing in disguise. I felt a bit weak so did not protest too much to being taken around the air port in a wheel chair, I was quite something to look at being the only white female and being wheeled around with my bags on my lap. The other white passengers were male and I think they must have come to work in the oil industry. On the flight to Owerri the man next to me was quite chatty. He gave me his number and insisted I called him to meet up...I tried to tell him it would be highly unlikely but told him I would as not to seem impolite. Martha says it is a way of begging. The runway was lined with palm trees and general forest, the earth was orange and people were cutting the bush. Friday the driver and Cecil the Assistant Welfare Officer picked me up from the airport. I was excited driving to Amaudo so took a lot of photos from the window.

Umuahia - the capital of Abia State and the nearest big town to Amaudo

The road to Amaudo !

Arriving at Amaudo everyone was sorry I did not have my luggage and Martha sorted me out with clothing and cooked me dinner. My house is rather big and the ceilings are high, I have a bedroom with two beds in and a wardrobe for my dresses. I have a separate room for my living and cooking area. The toilet and shower rooms are outside. You have to shower by scooping water out of a bucket but it’s very cooling so I like it a lot. It is also more relaxing than showering at home because you have lots of space, no noise and fresh sun light coming in through the window.